


Enlightened

by xXxCrimsonDreamsxXx



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! VRAINS
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst and Romance, Angst and Tragedy, Blood and Torture, Brainwashing, Fire Powers, Fire Torture, Implied Relationships, Implied Sexual Content, Inspired by Fanart, M/M, Major Character Injury, Memory Alteration, Memory Loss, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Possible Canonical Character Death, Psychological Torture, Revolver's Chained Up In A Room, SOLtis!Ai, SOLtis!Flame, SOLtis!Lightning, SOLtis!Windy, Slow Romance, Tags May Change
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:48:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 29,874
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23995534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xXxCrimsonDreamsxXx/pseuds/xXxCrimsonDreamsxXx
Summary: Humans are weak. Weakness is an unbearable fact, a darkness that every person rejects and would sell their soul for a little enlightenment that would bring them salvation both from themselves and from their love.In the light there is no past to cry, no dead to remember, no nightmares.The light envelops them in peace but this would be  ...  ephemeral.
Relationships: Ai | Ignis & Fujiki Yuusaku, Flame & Homura Takeru, Flame/Windy (Yu-Gi-Oh), Fujiki Yuusaku & Homura Takeru, Fujiki Yuusaku/Homura Takeru, Implied Fujiki Yuusaku/Lightning, Kusanagi Jin/Lightning, Lightning/Windy (Yu-Gi-Oh), Minor or Background Relationship(s), No Romantic Relationship(s), Other Relationship Tags to Be Added
Comments: 22
Kudos: 30





	1. If it all ends...

**Author's Note:**

> I am not coming with a ficlet or a poor drabble as always, but a TakeYusa LongFic.
> 
> I owe the AU idea to Valmey, a great artist who can be found on Twitter (Valmey_me)
> 
> I'm posting this now because of the anxiety of wanting to show this work, since I live in the uncertainty of what will happen tomorrow -playing violins on the background- And I hope that everyone is doing well in this quarantine, by the way.
> 
> Plus, at the beginning of each chapter I will leave a fragment of the poem "The Silent Light" by Wanshi, from a Zen practice (I guess?)
> 
> Hope you like it! also, sorry SORRY for my so cursed english. rEALLY i'm doing my best askjfhdjks

> **_"In this light all effort is forgotten._ **
> 
> **_What is the place of this splendor where light and clarity remove all confusion"_ **

****

**_~°~_ **

****

His body stirred in the bed, his nails scratched the fiber of the sheets in search of clinging to something, while sweat shone his skin and the silence of loneliness ended with heavy gasps and sobs that claimed peace. The walls, ceiling, floor, windows and furniture witnessed the mental torture the boy suffered every time the sun hid.

Shaking, punching and kicking messed up the bed, constant crying begged for it to end, and his desires were fulfilled with a short, sometimes long and heartbreaking cry, accompanied by pressure in his chest and tears that strolled by the sweat along the paths of his face.

The red clock lights screamed the hour and reminded him how little he had slept, how long the night would be, because it was long before the sun would show up and force him to rise. Long to wait, with his eyes stuck to anywhere, his mouth slightly open to get in and let out air. The beatings of his agitated heart painfully made his ears buzz, feeling that his lungs were burning and tearing, desperate to have some of the comforting breeze of the storm.

"Takeru...," the little Ignis was watching him and trying futilely to wake him up, suffering by empathizing and worrying about his partner from the duel disc that was perching near his pillow.

Takeru had hardly remembered his presence until he heard his voice, soft and comforting as the warmth of a candle in a blackout. "I'm fine, Flame. Is... the usual,'' he sighed

A sigh that had also escaped from the lips of another boy, as night fell, two boys writhed in their respective beds and rooms, being tortured by their own minds. Memory reliving at bedtime and pressing on their worst fears and pains.

Nightmares. The only thing that could be described as incurable to them.

When and how would it end? Why did life choose them to suffer in such a way that it seems eternal and deserved?

"Hey, Yusaku...," the Ignis murmured, poking his head out of the orb that enclosed him, his golden eyes shining wrapped in his own element.

Ai tried to approach his origin whenever this happened, he didn't talk about it, he just sought to annoy him enough to make him forget. But, again and again, his origin was suffering because of the reason for his birth, watching him sob and writhing under the blankets.

Helplessness was an unbearable feeling. Ai had come to that conclusion.

"Just…Forget it, Ai. Please."

Yusaku buried his face in his hands, sighing heavily, deciding that sleep was no longer an option.

Takeru decided that, too.

~°~

The bell resonated, nor that deafening sound was able to awaken the blue-haired boy, who had plunged, as always, into the world of dreams in the middle of the class, with sunlight painting his desk and the dull and deep melody of his teacher's voice.

A hand slightly shook his body, calling his name shyly.

Yusaku slowly opened his eyes, searching who dared to interrupt his sleep. The person was not rough like Shima, his call provided respect and perhaps carried a little guilt when he was forced to wake him up. He knew who it was when he heard his voice better, before his emeralds came with lavender eyes that were vaguely appreciated because of his glasses.

A smile crossed Takeru's lips, his hand rested on Yusaku's shoulder. "We promised Kusanagi-san that we'd see him after school, will you come?"

The boy blinked, before assimilating reality and scratching his eye so it wouldn't close again. "Yeah, sorry," he mumbled, standing vaguely from his seat.

"Don't worry, I…"

"Takeru took his precious time to wake you up, he was too busy looking at you," Flame said, peeking from the duel disk.

Takeru coughed violently "S-Stop saying nonsense, Flame!" He shook the air with his hand, smiling nervously.

"Ah? But your face turned red~" Ai hummed, pulling half his body out of Yusaku's backpack.

"Can we go back to the serious conversation, please?!" Takeru insisted, his cheeks starting to feel even warmer. It's just that Yusaku looked so cute when he slept! He couldn't help it…

Yusaku tilted his head, lost in conversation, without understanding a word they were saying. Maybe he hadn't woken up at all. "The point is...," he sighed, "that I'll wash my face and then go see Kusanagi-san"

"Y-Yeah," Takeru mumbled as he watched his partner walk away. When he was left alone in the classroom, he didn't know why he felt as if heavy rain fell on his head, sinking his shoulders.

He rested his hand on his neck, rubbing himself wearily.

"Aren't you going with him?" Flame asked

Takeru blinked bewildered, had not realized that he was lost in Yusaku's uncomfortable silence, worrying over the distance between his glances. A melancholy feeling tightened his heart.

"Uh? yeah, but…"

He raised his arm to get Flame face-to-face and glare him.

"Why did you have to embarrass me like that?"

Flame shrugged. "He didn't realize it, does it really matter?"

Takeru didn't know whether to relieve himself or be deeply disappointed. He had feelings for Yusaku, and Flame knew it, but if Yusaku didn't look at him the same way, then…

No. It wasn't time to worry about those stuff. He merely accompanied him, however, what did not leave his head were those deep dark circles on Yusaku's face.

" _He also…"_

~°~

Kusanagi had detected an anomaly inside VRAINS, consisting of a hidden door under an Ignis algorithm that he was barely able to decipher, providing access so that Playmaker and Soulburner could go in and check. His desperate heart told him that there they could find a clue about Lightning's whereabouts, and consequently his brother's.

Although, it was a fact that fighting Lightning meant fighting Jin. That thought burned his chest, repeating himself he would make pay the Light Ignis, no matter what.

But, on the other hand, discovering that door was not as difficult as exposing it. Something was wrong…

"It could be a trap, are you sure you want to go?"

The question was directly to Yusaku. "It's the only lead we have," he insisted

"Don't worry, Kusanagi-san, we'll be fine," Takeru said with a comforting smile.

Without further reason, clinging to hope, the two duelists entered their respective cabins and connected to VRAINS, landing on their boards, ready to follow the coordinates Kusanagi sent them. They weren't too far away.

Therefore, they soon reached that golden, oval light, the access to the supposed hideout. Playmaker and Soulburner entered without hesitation, being taken to a palace, large columns surrounded them as they walked cautiously through a corridor illuminated by large windows that let pass in the sun. There was no door, a sign, only a path that led them to a small room that gave a feeling of dizziness.

A series of statues of what could be Roman soldiers surrounded them, pointed their spears and bows at them as if they were really going to attack them. But, they were motionless.

"I don't feel anything...," Playmaker said, walking in circles as he watched each of the statues.

"All I feel is repulsed by the look of these guys," Ai added as he hugged himself, staring at a lancer.

"Do you think we should leave?" Soulburner suggested, not denying that the statues also gave him some chills.

Playmaker shook his head. "We have to keep looking, maybe there's something in the statues," he replied, extending his hand to one of them, his emeralds fixed in the stone eyes that for a few seconds were illuminated.

A soft, harmonious voice echoed in his head, throbbing as if his brain wanted to be free.

_"All fear discards your prudence; all weakness must be dead here,_ " the voice said.

He had forgotten who he was, where he was, everything turned brilliant around him.

" _It's the place I've already made a warning, where you'll see the painful people who lost the gift of intelligence"_

"Playmaker!"

Another voice pulled him out of that hypnotic singing, blinking permanently and acknowledging that it had been Ai who shook him from his distraction. He had no time to feel his despair or the danger he was in through the strange game of his imagination.

Soulburner had already pushed him, shouting, "Look out!"

Why?

Playmaker had quickly turned his gaze to find the stone archer moving to aim at him and shoot an arrow at his direction. It could have stuck in his chest, but it was Soulburner's protection that prevented that from happening.

"Soulburner!"

The arrow had hit Soulburner's chest, breaking the jade that remained there. His scream filled the room as a golden glow enveloped him and blinded both Playmaker and Ai, covering himself with the back of his hand, desperately seeking to see, even a bit to rescue him from whatever was taking him.

The heat of the light burned him, it was impossible for his eyes to stay open, the sharp sound of the stone breaking left him deaf until the light faded.

Just like Soulburner.

Playmaker opened his eyes slowly, removing his own hand to find his partner. But he...

... Disappeared.

"Soulburner... Soulburner!"

He began to roam the palace, breathing becoming heavy to keep, the sweat running through his neck and his fast and terrified heartbeats of not being able to feel any sign. The statues were still again, everything looked like before the voice began to stun his mind.

"This must be Lightning's trick...,"

Playmaker painfully squeezed his fists.

Hearing this, Ai began to look around, expressing more anguish than his own origin. "Lightning! Stop hiding, you coward!"

As if his yell had strength, the whole palace trembled. The windows were broken, the pillars threatened to fall, as the sky vanished like a rain of deleted data.

"It's collapsing!" Ai shouted, "We must log out!"

"I'm not leaving Soulburner behind!"

"But if we die here, we can't help him anyway!"

Playmaker ignored Ai's words, continued to dodge the rubble, clinging to the hope that Soulburner was hidden somewhere nearby, if they log out now... They could never come back.

"Playmaker!" his Ignis insisted, without receiving an answer, followed by a desperate growl, "That's it! I'll force the disconnection!"

Unable to argue, he took control of Playmaker's decision whether or not to stay, already waking up inside the cabin, still sweating cold. He went out quickly, finding himself with Kusanagi's frustrated gaze. Takeru's cabin was open, but there was no trace of his body, nor that he left or entered.

Kusanagi didn't saw him.

"Kusanagi-san…"

He was about to urge him to keep searching, to trace the location data, the information he gathered, no matter how tiny, to find Takeru, but his legs failed him and nearly fell to the ground, but Kusanagi held him. "We'll find him, Jin and... Lightning"

The bitterness slid down on his tongue by mentioning the latter, causing Yusaku to respond in the same way.

He should have received that arrow, not Takeru.

The voice appeared to distract him, it was like a light that enveloped him in confusion and broke him as Soulburner's jade. He took a hand to his head, he couldn't even remember the words or his tone.

"I know you won't listen to me, but I need you to rest"

Yusaku nodded at Kusanagi's request, even knowing that no matter how many turns he went in bed, he could not fall asleep. Yusaku wouldn't do it until this was all over, and everyone was safe.

~°~

Two days had passed and Takeru was still missing, as well as any other signals regarding the Light Ignis. They looked for Takeru in his apartment, he wasn't there either, and no one knew about him, they even reacted as if the name was strange.

Ai tried to communicate with Flame, but was out of reach, totally faded as his origin. Yusaku decided to go to school, in the strange hope that the boy may attend or show himself in front of other students or teachers. He had given up on that thought as soon as he set foot in the classroom, the seat next to him was empty, the one Takeru always occupied in the classes they shared.

If Takeru was somewhere, that would be VRAINS, but it's not like they haven't tried to look for him there these days. Nothing. No trace.

He was lost in his thoughts while the teacher was doing a roll call, passing Yusaku's surname and others who came next, until the 'H' arrived. There were only two boys with a last name that started with that letter.

Takeru and one more.

However, the teacher didn't say his name, he did not even declare him absent. Realizing this, Yusaku immediately raised his hand, straightening his back.

"Is something wrong, Fujiki?

"You forgot to ask for Homura"

Even if he was absent, he had to mention his name. Why did he ignored it?

The teacher looked at him and waved his head, frowning as if Yusaku were crazy, blinked and settled his glasses, re-checking the list to ensure his next response.

"No, there is no Homura in the class, Fujiki, you must be…"

"Check it out! _Homura, Takeru_. He _has_ to be there!"

His insistence was showed up when he rose sharply from his seat, he had not realized that he was raising his voice, all he could hear was his fast heartbeat and the need to get to the teacher to read the list and check by himself.

But that wasn't possible.

"Hey, Fujiki-kun, sit down," he heard Shima say from behind him, "We never had a 'Homura Takeru' in our class, or even at school"

'Never'? What were they talking about?!

Shima couldn'tt say that, he had also exchanged, —even if it was two words— with Takeru. Even if Takeru had never shared this class and was just getting confused, it couldn't be true that he wasn't at this school.

He felt dizzy, he couldn't help but lean on the table, trying to keep the world from falling on him

"Fujiki, you should go to the infirmary," the teacher said, causing to feel like Shima was offering to lead him, about to take him by the arm until Yusaku pushed him away.

"I will… go alone," he mumbled before leaving the classroom.

The last place he'd go would be the infirmary. He had to figure out what was going on, and he soon message Kusanagi to check Takeru's student record and Soulburner's user status, and confirm whether his existence remained in VRAINS.

Yusaku waited for his answer as he headed to the lockers, looking for Takeru's. He remembered where his locker was, but there was another name there. Yusaku wanted to believe that it was moved, that this was all a teacher and Shima's mistake. The search ended, without finding his name, his presence at this school.

It was then that his phone vibrated, receiving Kusanagi's response.

Yusaku's hand began to shake, squeezing the phone as he was going to break it at any moment. He couldn't believe this, his feet failed and he unconsciously slid his back into the wall where he had cornered, until fell on the ground. Without ripping his eyes out of the message, from the lockers with other names.

Ai saw his chance to get his body out of Yusaku's backpack. "Well? What did Kusanagi-san find? I bet your theory is false, there's no way Takeru don't…"

"... exist."

"Huh?"

"His student card is not there, it is not on the user list in VRAINS, Kusanagi-san couldn't find his ID. It's as if…"

He swallowed heavily, saying it meant a too big and painful weight, something inside him was exploding for every time he repeated it to himself, increasing confusion, tearing him, burning his guts.

"It's as if Takeru doesn't exist…"


	2. No doubts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What if the pain could be completely eliminated?  
> The light in his eyes, his voice emits a corrupted melody.  
> Don't think about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maybe the story will be updated every Sunday / Monday, if I don't get stuck on the road and end up delaying the posts. (i really hope not)  
> Thanks to Valmey for being my beta reader too and correct my english here, luv u
> 
> Also, thank you all those who leave kudos on this story, it really makes my day
> 
> Enjoy!

**_"The essence of a particle passes through the infinitesimal;_ **

**_is the gold shuttle over the jade loom"_ **

**_~°~_ **

****

Wrapped in a golden, shiny blanket, opening his eyes would be bold of him, the stupidity of going blind when burned with light. Even when he could hear thousands of voices inside of him, the memories that, to this day, he was unconsciously trying to avoid. That he thought he wanted to remember, but that was a lie.

Now that he could remember, he didn't want to do so. He needed to get lost into oblivion and ignorance again, his throat was painfully scraped by his cries for help. _It’s like a nightmare with no end._ He repeated constantly to himself, regardless of whether he was left with no voice, with no heart to beat nervously.

"Soulburner…"

The voices fighting to take a place in his ears were pushed back to make space for a new, deeper voice. It was an ephemeral relief. The boy kept his hands over his ears as if that could make everything go quiet. He raised his head, attentive to the new voice that was coming up.

"Remember, Soulburner."

He bit his lip, grunting in response and crouching his head again, refusing to listen. He caught his ears in his hands as if he wanted to rip them off. "No. I can't."

"You can."

Those words echoed more than the memories insisting on coming back and Soulburner pushed the invisible fire to burn them.

"But I don't want to!"

His yell echoed in his head, he felt as if he were inside his mind, being able to hear and feel his thoughts while being by their side. The more he denied those memories, the more they insisted on appearing.

The voices, the screams, the cries.

His parents' faces laughing just to fade into those expressions of disappointment and sadness at the wrath of his six-year-old son whose last words before slamming the door were of him yelling at them:

_I hope I never see you again!_

His chest was painfully squeezed, feeling each of those words, wanting to burn himself with the flames coming from his knuckles. It was like an indirect desire, one that he never genuinely kept in his heart but still yelled out.

All for a stupid tantrum.

After that memory, came the electric shocks, his lingering trauma that he relived constantly every night, just like the nightmares that stalked him.

Despair from the dark.

Damn that card that he thought was removed from his fears; all those fears reappeared to plunge him into despair.

"That's enough! No more… Stop." He sobbed, hugging himself, feeling cold.

"Open your eyes, then."

He frantically shook his head. "No! I don't want to see!"

"If you want to forget... Open your eyes."

Soulburner opened his mouth slightly, to say something, to complain and reject the offer, but he was already tempted by the light that forced him to abandon the darkness of his closed eyes, like the sun in the morning that burned through his eyelids. It wasn't annoying, it was comforting. All the suffering that made his brain throb, that intolerable pain in his chest was disappearing.

He blinked, over and over again. Soft, cold hands caressed his face; the line of his chin, his fingers rubbed the bridge of his nose, moving up to his forehead. The light did not allow him to see who gave him such comfort, and his voice was unrecognizable, not that he had the chance to hear it again.

He just knew those touches meant that everything would be fine, that he would soon forget.

But there was only one thing, one person Soulburner didn't want to forget…

~°~

"Yusaku…"

The sound of his name made him vaguely lift his head, half his face numb and slightly reddened for having rested it too long against his arms. The first thing he saw as he opened his eyes was a smiling Kusanagi.

A weakened smile, Yusaku didn't need to be awake enough to realize that.

They had stayed all night in the truck looking for any small signs of Takeru, Jin, or the Ignis. At this step of despair in which the hearts of both were, they would accept any kind of clue.

"The sun's up, it's waiting for you to get up to school. C'mon," Kusanagi said, trying to keep his spirits up, as usual.

"What are you going to do?" Yusaku asked as he stood from his seat, leaning against the table, waiting for his whole body to react so he could stop moving like a robot.

Kusanagi had a bag on his arm. Yusaku knew the answer, but he needed to hear it anyway. "To see Jin," he replied, his smile weakened much more.

That bag carried comic books, music records that made Jin react when he had woken up before Lightning kidnapped him. Kusanagi would always sit next to him, read to him, make him listen to those songs as if that could magically wake Jin up and make him respond to that. Even if only to tell him he bored him or that his musical choices were shit.

"What sets them apart?" Yusaku suddenly asked, "Takeru and Jin"

"Jin is physically in this world, no one forgot about him, but Takeru disappeared completely," Kusanagi added, resting his hand on his chin.

"And we're the only ones who remember him"

"Me too!" Ai got in, coming off the duel disk

"Why? Why just us?"

"Maybe we're not the only ones, we haven't contacted Revolver or Blue Girl," Kusanagi replied.

Not that they tried, Yusaku didn't want to do it either, the fewer people were involved in what happened, the better. Revolver remained an enemy of the Ignis, and although he could define himself as an ally in this war, Yusaku had to approach him cautiously. Blue Girl, as little as he knew about her in this context, only worked for her brother.

Yusaku couldn't help but let out a sigh, not realizing that he had crouched his head down. "Maybe Lightning chose us specifically, the arrow was pointing at me, not Takeru"

He put his hand on his chest, feeling a knot form in his throat. Kusanagi took him by his chin and forced him to look at him. "Don't blame yourself. Let's just find Takeru, and save Jin"

With some hesitation at not being able to ignore his anguish, he tried to nod.

Kusanagi walked away and with a vague goodbye, he left the truck. Yusaku then proceeded to take his backpack and make his way to school.

It was painful getting there, not because of the looks he received for yesterday’s situation, but because of the number of people who wondered who Takeru Homura was, and because he was used to walking and receiving a close and friendly greeting, accompanied by a hug.

That slightly changed his lonely expression every time he walked to school, it was something Ai mentioned in the early days he spent with Takeru. All that had vanished like his name in the lockers.

"Fujiki-kun"

Yusaku heard Shima's annoying voice entering his ear next to the weight of his hand on his shoulder. It wasn't the first greeting he wanted to receive.

Yusaku didn't answer.

"Wow, you look more bored than usual without Homura-kun by your side. Did you fight?"

Yusaku abruptly stopped his steps, causing Shima to do the same and look at him nervously. 

"What did you say?

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to intrude, but…"

"Did you say Homura?!" he insisted again, desperation spilling into his voice, his gaze at Shima turned away to head towards the boy walking before them.

That whitish hair with reddish locks, it could... it _had_ to be him.

Passing past Shima, he sped his way towards the boy. Yusaku didn't understand what was going on and he didn't care about asking, he just wanted to see Takeru again and the answers to his questions could come later.

He stood in front of the boy, stopping his walk.

Pale, fine lips, wearing glasses that covered beautiful lavender eyes. It was Takeru, no doubt.

"Takeru…"

It was the first thing he managed to say, not knowing why he was so agitated if he didn’t have to run to reach him, his heart was pounding and screaming with emotion.

"Are you all right?"

Takeru stared at him, blinking until he smiled slightly. Yusaku had not noticed that slight twinkle in his eyes that reflected on his glasses, which Takeru began to remove. Yusaku thought it was to clean them, or because of the invisible sunlight that may burn his eyes, but no…

He showed a starry, golden look over the usual color of his eyes, losing the energy of his personality and adopting a completely different one. Yusaku shuddered.

"Ah, how strange," Takeru murmured, "It was always me who approached you, you never tried to do so…"

_Something's wrong._ Yusaku thought instantly and he stepped back, taking a better look at his partner. 

Takeru chuckled, interrupting his thoughts. That chuckle felt empty, lacking the usual sympathy that characterized the boy in front of him,

This wasn't Takeru.

"I'm sorry, did I scare you?"

"Takeru, what happened to you?"

Their classmates kept walking past them until there were no more people around them who could hear them, even Shima decided that it would be best to leave them alone, that or he didn't care at all about what the two of them had to talk about.

"I'm healing, Yusaku," he spoke almost too excited, taking Yusaku's face and resting his forehead against Yusaku's "I'm no longer afraid"

Yusaku kept looking at him, feeling his breath. That was the only warmth emanating from him. "Your eyes... You are... You disappeared"

"And I'll do it again, but I had to return and take you with me"

Yusaku could only gasp in surprise, taking one step back and away from Takeru. "I don't understand"

"I didn't understand it either, but soon, my nightmares stopped bothering me, I stopped being afraid. I am abandoning my darkness, to regain my peace, my inner light"

Takeru also walked away, his hand on his chest

"Flame! Aren't you going to say anything to your origin? He's already speaking nonsense,' Ai claimed, coming off the duel disk on Yusaku's arm.

After a few seconds of silence, Takeru replied. "Flame's not here"

"What do you mean, he's not here?!"

"Lightning-sama saved him. Like he saved me…"

it felt like a cold breeze seeping through his body yet Yusaku still found his voice to express his bewilderment.

"Lightning-sama?!"

Yusaku and Ai yelled at the same time.

~°~

Tac, tac, tac

The constant sound of his fingernail hitting the marble table where he rested echoed in the room, and it was beginning to be the only thing to be heard when the green-haired Ignis stopped sighing.

"Didn't I ask you to keep an eye on the Fire Ignis, Windy?"

A young man with golden hair and emerald eyes, pale, synthetic skin, turned to look at him. Pretending a higher height than the rest with platforms that helped him fulfill that goal, while the other boy next to him who stood in front of him, kept the short stature he had been given.

The two carried a crystal in the center of the neck that differentiated them from humans.

"Lightning, dear Lightning... Flame is still on the balcony, waiting like a faithful dog for his origin. I got bored of watching him"

A smirk crossed the blonde's lips as he looked at Windy. "You never get tired of looking at him. You just don't dare have him look at you back"

Then Windy sighed again, kicking the ground. "What are you implying?! No one would want to be looked at when they look like THIS!"

He pointed at his face, a patch covered his right eye and his clothing covered the bandages that engulfed his body. If he were in his Ignis form and not the SOLtiS body they 'borrowed' his scars and deformities caused by the Knights of Hanoi would be much easier to notice.

Windy rubbed his hands. "I can't wait to make those bastards pay for what they did to me"

The twisted voice of the Wind Ignis did not go unnoticed by Lightning, but that didn’t prevent him from ignoring Windy.

"But first...," Lightning said walking towards the short one "You must do what I asked, Windy," he pronounced softly, taking his chin and forcing both starry eyes to meet.

Without Windy saying anything, Lightning smiled and stroked his cheek with his thumb. "Now, go"

The wind Ignis walked to the room he shared with the Fire Ignis, which led to the balcony where the latter was standing. Windy wasn't going to deny it, his android body trembled every time he saw him, and he still couldn't figure out why, but he couldn't stand it and that's why he tried to avoid him.

The anger that increased within him grew every time Flame named his origin, which was every time they shared a word.

Flame turned out to be pretty unbearable.

But Windy couldn't disobey Lightning.

It wasn't an idea he could keep in his system. As it was wondering why he had no origin to talk about, why it bothered him so much thinking about it when in his days in the Cyberse, the idea of living with humans didn't mean bitterness.

He shook his head. It had always been a bad idea. 

Lightning was right about everything.

That he repeated to himself before taking a few steps forward and standing next to Flame, resting on the railing, letting the breeze kiss his face and hair.

Flame embraced himself, leaning on the same railing, looking up at the sky with melancholy shining in his eyes.

"Why are you the only one who's still uncomfortable whit this place? Even your origin looks happy, he just needs that... Playmaker to feel complete," Windy said attempting to break the ice. Suddenly, he drew a malicious smile on his face as he received no response from the fire Ignis. "Ah! I know! You're jealous"

"You're talking nonsense. What makes Takeru happy makes me happy," Flame replied finally, moving away from the balcony to get back to the room. Windy leaped to stand on the ground and followed him.

"There has to be something else that makes you happy. He shouldn't be the only reason you're here.”

Windy heard Flame sigh.

He hated his sighs.

“Your mission is to keep an eye on me, not to interrogate me. Follow your path and I’ll follow mine, with no explanations.” 

With that, Flame left the room, leaving Windy alone with that answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I already did it in the previous chapter, but I recommend again that you go check the twitter of Valmey (valmey_me), my muse who encourages me to continue writing this AU and break my heart doing it. She makes several fanarts about this AU, that's why I started writing this story. (I think I already said it before)
> 
> Also, if you want a reference of what the Ignis would look like in their SOLtiS bodies, I invite you to also check the twitter of another artist (nwsksun) who designs their appearance in such a magnificent way. 
> 
> With that said, thanks for reading!
> 
> See ya!


	3. Our truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nobody understands  
> There's no reason to fight.  
> Then, listen... The truth untold.  
> Look at the light of his eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THANK YOU very much, for the kudos again. And thank you!!! to Valmey for being my beta reader here, and help not mess up with this language.
> 
> Please enjoy!!

> **_"Subject and object influence each other._ **
> 
> **_Light and darkness depend on each other"_ **

**_~°~_ **

Yusaku's head was spinning. He felt lucky they went to an empty square to sit down, otherwise, he would have fallen to the ground, weakened from all that was happening. They had been through a lot already, and this was the last thing he wanted. If Takeru was working alongside Lightning, it would mean fighting against him as well.

No. He couldn't do that, he had to make him come to his senses. 

But his mouth just didn't pronounce the words he wanted to say, his heart beating painfully as he failed to process all this new information, and it wasn’t even all of it yet.

They were sitting on a bench, side by side, Yusaku kept staring at Takeru and his bright starry eyes that looked like they were trying to seize his common sense as they stared at Yusaku’s emerald eyes. Yusaku bit his lip with enough strength for the pain to linger long enough to calm his anxiety.

"Takeru, can’t you see that Lightning is just trying to manipulate you? He takes advantage of you to separate us"

Yusaku found the words to insist, but Takeru was not shaken by his words. Lightning had brainwashed him.

"You're the one who still doesn't understand, Yusaku. It's natural, you haven't felt it yet," Takeru said, voice way too calm.

Yusaku frowned. "Felt what?"

"Peace," he replied, "Your whole life you've been struggling, suffering. We know what we had to live through, but just as we share the pain, we can also share peace. Come with me, Yusaku"

Takeru took Yusaku’s hands, looking at him, smiling as if he had found a cure for a terminal illness. At least it seemed it something like that.

Yusaku looked down at their joined hands. Takeru’s felt cold, his palms were dry, Yusaku had just noticed the difference in sizes, his fingers were thinner, his knuckles were bony while Takeru's were thick, which could give him the impression that a punch from him would hurt too much and leave a long-term mark. However, Yusaku was not thinking about that, but observing the scratches on them and they had a slight gray and yellowish hue.

Perhaps Takeru, to quell his anger and sadness, punched the walls.

Yusaku looked up, green eyes staring at lilac ones. "I'll go with you"

Takeru let out a relieved sigh before Yusaku continued.

"But not to... heal myself, I'm going to speak with Lightning personally"

Takeru's expression changed completely, to one full of seriousness and perhaps some insecurity. "If you decide to go against him, I will decide who to protect"

Those words were like an icy blizzard in a heavy storm as if thunder hit the ground to burn him even in the summer sun.

"Takeru…"

Takeru hugged Yusaku's hand with both of his, closing them into fists as he closed his eyes and whispered: "Into the VRAINS"

Both their duel disks shone, wrapping them in holographic spheres as they were carried by the waves of the net. As he opened his eyes again, he stopped feeling the grip on his hand, and his feet touched the ground.

He looked at the place around him, once again they were in a place similar to a Roman palace. It wasn't the same as before, it felt more like it was the parts missing from the one they explored before, with doors and even more corridors. This place was complete.

"Follow me"

Soulburner's voice distracted Playmaker—no—It was his clothes that took him out of his thoughts, it was the only thing he could look at. Soulburner wore a more complex, adorned outfit that reminded him of Jin's; a folded high-necked—unlike Jin—, mantle beautifully decorated with gold-edged, slightly concealed stars at each tip, underneath he wore a white coat that was also decorated with gold in the same way as the mantle and under it a black jumpsuit that covered his entire body except for his shoulders, some fingers, and feet, which were dressed in high-heeled sandals.

Black and gold were what highlighted, as well as the now star-shaped Jade adorning his chest next to the white that enveloped him as a false purity. Yes, his face, his hair, was Soulburner's, but those where the only thing that remained from Soulburner as Playmaker looked at him.

Soulburner’s eyes still kept that starry light that was unnerving to look at and Playmaker was relieved to just stare at Soulburner’s back as he leads the way, even though Soulburner felt larger than normal and his surroundings had a cold atmosphere despite the sun’s heat coming through the windows.

The road down the hall was quiet, except for the sound of Soulburner's heels and his own feet following him from behind.

"Are you sure about this, Playmaker?" Ai asked in a whisper "Remember the last time we met him without a plan"

"And you think it's best to say no and let him go? Because Soulburner has no intention to change his mind," Playmaker replied coldly, even though inside he was breaking apart.

If he turned down the only chance he had to find Lightning, he could have risked Soulburner's life and the rest of the mission. This was the only clue they had.

They kept walking until they reached a wide hall, a golden light pointing to the throne that was on a floating platform, next to it an elegant stool. When they arrived, there was no one there, but then a data sphere surrounded the throne and stool.

The one occupying the smallest seat was Jin and next to him, another person perhaps a bit older or around the same age as them, but it didn't matter since Playmaker immediately identified him as a SOLtiS—the androids SOL Technologies were designing—because of the crystal that decorated his neck. The blonde boy could be defined as beautiful, with his scarlet lips and serene, starry green eyes.

With a graceful leap, as if he were but a weightless feather, he reached Soulburner and his "guest", with Jin following him from behind. 

Playmaker felt Ai become tense, he was not going to deny that he also felt something strange when the SOLtiS approached. "Lightning," Ai said.

Playmaker wasn't surprised by the revelation, but he was horrified by the image of Soulburner kneeling in front of Lightning, bowing at him.

"It's good to see you came back, Ai, I guess you reconsidered my offer," Lightning's deep voice resonated in Playmaker's ears, installed in his brain as if it were his thoughts.

"Of course not! And how dare you become taller than me?!" Ai pointed out capriciously.

Lightning arched an eyebrow. "How dare _you_ betray your own family? Even Flame reconsidered and is here on his own"

"I don't think you gave him any other choice," Playmaker argued, "Like Soulburner, what did you do to him?"

Soulburner had straightened after Lightning signaled him with his thin index finger, but kept his mouth shut as if opening it out of turn meant a sin to him.

"I seized his memories, his reality, because he wanted me to do so," The Light Ignis explained, appearing from his expanded palm a luminous sphere that showed a kid hugging his knees, his eyes were closed, in a peaceful dream. It was Takeru.

"His consciousness...," Playmaker said

"You are wrong, it's his fears; his anguish. Soulburner is fully aware of who he is and what he wants, that's why he's here and of his own free will, he asked my permission to bring you here. Having you here is not indifferent to me, however, you are not indispensable, Playmaker, Ai"

"But making Soulburner and Playmaker fight is playing dirty!" Ai intervened

"They won't fight if Playmaker doesn't decide to do so "

His bright gaze turned towards Soulburner, making him step forward. "Playmaker, the last thing I want is to fight you. I brought you here so we wouldn’t have to fight anymore, so that we wouldn’t have to worry about that"

Playmaker put his hand on his chest, despair showing slightly on his face. "What about Kusanagi-san? We promised him we'd bring his brother back!"

Soulburner shook his head. "Don't worry, that promise will be forgotten, as will be the reason for Jin to be in a coma, and everything that happened, Kusanagi-san will also forget knowing us. Jin will be safe here, nothing is going to hurt him"

"Lightning hurt him!" Ai insisted, as his origin swallowed heavy, looking for a way to find his words and not break trying.

"What do you mean he'll forget us?"

It was Lightning's turn to speak up. "I'm making a program that will delete all memorial data that relates to the incident and you. Your existence outside the network will be completely eliminated, just as you will gradually forget the life you had"

"We'll start over, Playmaker," Soulburner added with a smile full of enthusiasm.

"Your real bodies will be the ones you have now, the rest will disappear like dust. There can be no war if there's nothing to fight for"

_No, he can’t be serious. This had to be a nightmare._ Playmaker repeated those words in his head, taking a few awkward steps back as if the spacious room had become smaller and the sunlight blinded him. "Soulburner…"

"Playmaker…"

They both called each other with concern in their eyes. Soulburner was close enough to Playmaker to caress his cheek, not caring about who was around them. "Think about it, I'll come back tomorrow for you"

"There's nothing to think about," Playmaker replied sharply, turning around to run away and log out. If he stayed there for another second, he was going to collapse.

Soulburner nearly followed him, but Lightning put his arm on his way to stop him. "Go back for him tomorrow, as you said," he ordered

"But he's already made his choice!"

"He didn't, that's why he escaped. Playmaker is unstable, let him incorporate all the information and then you'll be able to heal his pain"

~°~

When he disconnected from the net, Takeru was not by his side. He didn't want to investigate whether his existence had been eliminated as Lightning said, as it was demonstrated yesterday

It didn't make sense. They couldn’t just be deleted as if they were simple data.

But that’s what happened to Takeru, and it could happen to him too. What would happen to Kusanagi? Would he wait for his brother to wake up for no reason?

A buzz made his head hurt horribly. He couldn't think clearly and Lightning's voice mixed with Takeru's only echoed in his mind, leaving no room for his opinions.

Yusaku let himself collapse on his bed, looking at the ceiling. The sun hid to give space to the moonlight, however, darkness prevailed in his room.

He scratched the blankets.

"Yusaku…"

He turned a deaf ear to Ai's voice, ignoring turning on the light. 

The decision to eliminate the pain, the incident, all the suffering. If Lightning had that power if that was his way of not causing a war, to make everyone happy…

Would it be justice at the end of the day? Windy's origin, Revolver, Kusanagi…

Their lives would change. His own life would be different, and he might have…

... a future by Takeru’s side. The Ignis would be safe, maybe even Earth would be restored.

There would be a balance.

In the past, he refused to keep the incident in the dark, but bringing it to light didn’t change his pain. If he closed his eyes now and slept, he would only fall into the world of nightmares, reliving his trauma over and over again.

Why was he fighting?

Jin.

Jin would wake up, and then…

What? He'd suffer the same as him, as Takeru.

"Yusaku, you aren’t thinking of listening to Lightning, right?"

Ai's voice got into his head, interrupting his confusion.

He shook his head slightly, sitting on the bed.

No, he couldn't give up. There was still a future to fight for, and forgetting the past was not the solution, altering people's memory wasn't either.

Although, Takeru…

He couldn't help but think of his smile. He looked happy, safe.

Yusaku pulled a piece of the jade that broke out of his pocket, Ai had been keeping it since Soulburner was taken away and handed it to him that same night.

It was a fragment of Takeru's memory, with a single memory on it. However, Yusaku decided not to look at it.

Until today.

The piece vanished when he placed it on top of the orb of his duel disk, regardless of Ai.

The memory projected from his duel disk into his room, vague images and voices at first before a clear image was visible. He was in a room similar to his, but a little cleaner and not as small, the lights were off, a lump sobbed under the blankets, shaking. As Yusaku moved around the bed, he saw Takeru next to his duel disk, from which the Fire Ignis looked at him, trying to comfort him.

_"Takeru…"_

_"I'm fine... I'm fine"_

_Takeru's voice was muffled, agitated, he tried for a while to calm down his breathing. Tears were dry on his cheeks. "Did ... did I say something while…?"_

_Flame shook his head. "No. You were just mumbling a name"_

_"Yusaku," he said with such confidence that it seemed to have happened many times. He called him as if it was the only name capable of taking him out of his misery._

_After a few seconds of silence, Takeru sighed hugging his phone under the pillow, Flame dropped his shoulders. "Why don't you call him? You know he's awake"_

_Takeru shrunk. "I know, that's why I won't bother him"_

_"Aren't you friends? I don't think you'd bother him, maybe he needs you in the same way"_

_Takeru scratched his pillow and bit his tongue. "No, he doesn't need me the same way I do"_

_Flame sighed. "Because you have feelings for him, but that doesn't change…"_

_"That doesn't change the fact that I'll bother him! It was quite difficult to approach him and be something close to a friend, I can't tell him how I feel now and mess things up like that…"_

Yusaku felt a sweltering pressure on his chest, blinking constantly until the memory faded, with nothing more to show. He held his head, dizzy, sweating cold

How many times?

How many times did Takeru need to talk to him and hesitated out of fear of him turning him down?

Yes, Yusaku understood that feeling, needing someone to talk to in the middle of the night and feel hugged by his laugh, calming down his anxiety, but he only ended up hugging himself, not thinking that someone might need him or that he might receive something from someone else; Takeru, specifically

Takeru…

Takeru had feelings for him. 

Takeru greeted him, smiled at him, hugged, and protected him. 

So many moments, so many times he'd kept and swallowed that pain in silence.

Now, Takeru had a chance to be happy.

_"Soulburner is fully aware of who he is and what he wants, that's why he's here and of his own free will, he asked me permission to bring you here"_

But Takeru couldn't be truly happy if Yusaku wasn't by his side.

That thought wouldn’t leave his head, the decision became clearer as he laid in bed, waiting for the next day.

Waiting for the sun to come up and light up his window.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading  
> Please take care and stay at home!
> 
> See ya!


	4. Angel of pain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The angel closed his wings, and realized how tired he was.   
> The lost breeze helped him up and look into the light.  
> Fire doesn't know what perfection is, keeping secrets to itself.

> **_"When their reciprocal action is harmonized, there is no more dependence between the spirit and the letter"_ **

**_~°~_ **

****

His gaze was on the stained glass window, there were no more colors than white and gold, highlighting the image of an angel who embraced themselves with their wings as if they were unable to spread them and fly, similar to a growing flower, closed and waiting for sunlight to help it bloom.

The melancholy could be seen in Lightning's eyes, it overwhelmed him clinging to his own hands, in the silence of loneliness, the calmness of controlling his surroundings. If Lightning looked at his reflection, he wouldn't realize his emotions, he could only make sure of his determination, that everything was going the way he expected.

Yes, the puzzle was incomplete, but it just required a little more patience. Harmony was still present in this place.

"What kind of obsession do humans have with angels?"

Windy's voice ended the silence.

"A horrible stained-glass window, if you allow me to say," he added, with his voice full of indifference.

"I don't allow it," Lightning replied coldly.

Windy clicked his tongue. Lightning wasn't looking at him, but he knew Windy was laughing. "Lightning, don't you think it's ironic that we're disguised as the threat?"

Lightning looked at him, his expression full of seriousness. Clearly, Windy was referring to the fact that they changed their shape to a more human one, with the help of SOLtis bodies. 

"It'll be for a short time," he replied vaguely as he began to keep his walk down the corridor, determined to leave Windy alone. "Don't forget to tell Soulburner he can go out and pick up Playmaker whenever he wants"

He could hear Windy's footsteps following him from behind as he huffed "But you never told me the reason" Windy said completely ignoring the demand, as it was obvious that he would take it.

"Why should I?"

Lightning refused to look at him, Windy hated that about him. In that sense, Lightning had a lot in common with Flame. Neither of them was able to look at him, to say more than a few words that seemed to come out just to keep Windy quiet. It was as if the wind Ignis was just an annoying passing breeze.

Windy tried to stand in front of the Light Ignis and stop him from leaving. There was a difference in height, but he didn't want to feel small in front of anyone. Much less in front of Lightning or Flame.

"For the same reason I decided to be by your side. I was the only one who was there for you when no one else did, you could at least tell me what you think"

Windy's voice resonated in the corridor, where only the two of them were. A a few seconds passed before he got a response from Lightning.

He smiled. A tiny smile was on Lightning's face.

Was Lightning making fun of him?

Lightning finally looked him in the eye, causing the wind Ignis to shudder, especially when he began to pass his hand gently through his hair, going down to his chin. "You sided with me, but you don't know me at all"

His hand traveled through Windy's face, two of his fingers posing on the eyepatch "However, I know all about you. I know what you're capable of and what you're not"

He leaned his face, their noses rubbing, and Windy's tense breath mixed with Lightning's warmth. There was no more closeness than that, before the lips of the light grazed the ear of the wind, and blew a painful, shuddering whisper. "You have a lot to learn"

He observed in Windy an expression that denoted a growing frustration. Lightning widened his smile, before turning to give a last look at the stained-glass window.

The wind Ignis knew what Lightning meant when he said that, Lightning not only treating him as if he was an ignorant but also as useless, naive. Stupid. An incapable weakling. All because he lost to the leader of the Knights of Hanoi. Lightning never forgave him; he always took any opportunity to remind him that. This time he wouldn't shut up, he would tell him everything he thought right to his face. Lightning couldn't be perfect!

However, Windy couldn’t begin his complaint as it seemed that Lightning still had more things to say. "If humans die, where do you think they go?"

Windy tilted his head, his fury changing into confusion

"Huh? Well, they couldn't go anywhere voluntarily. They just turn off to rot," he replied, almost mockingly, and as if his answer was too obvious.

Lightning just nodded, still staring at the angel. He could see rays of light on the angel's wings and around it lines that could mean the wind. Both elements represented spiritual nature, purity, and strength

The height of the wings meant their spirituality, their aspirations. The fact that they were closed could say that the angel was still in the middle of the road to immortality, to that imaginary place where good and love were all that mattered.

The Light Ignis spat on those desperate humans' false beliefs. Paradise and underworld; heaven and hell. The necessary reasons for humans to regard life as motivating, but they fail so many times that dying and standing in front of those two supposed gates terrifies them.

The mere fact of not existing was terrifying.

"Of course you would answer something like that, for us, death means the deletion of our data. You know that very well, don't you?"

Lightning looked at him.

Windy lowered his head, clenching his fists tightly.

Lightning sighed before continuing "Humans, however, believe they have a soul, which, when they die, leaves their body and is taken to a paradise or the underworld, depending on the choices they have made"

The wind Ignis quickly regained his posture and laughed mockingly "Yeah, if they are _bad boys_ they _will burn_ in the flames of hell"

"What did you see when you were about to be eliminated?"

The question took him by surprise, completely eliminating his mocking smile, feeling a terrible unease as he recalled that moment. Windy subtly embraced himself, trying to find his own words "Distortion and ... darkness, maybe," he replied faintly

Lightning nodded again, walking past the other Ignis. "And if you were a human, about to die...," he began to say, his voice echoed in the corridors "Where would your _soul_ go?"

That question echoed in Windy's mind, who, upset, turned to Lightning to confront him, get answers, whatever. But he wasn't there anymore.

Windy was left alone with his doubts.

~°~

The fire was recreated in his palm, it was impressive the things he could do now that he lacked limits, but Soulburner was still incomplete. He looked up at the sky from the balcony of his room, the sun was a fake, yet it burned like the real one.

Everything felt real. It was wonderful. "I only need Playmaker for this to be perfect...," he whispered to himself, even when Flame was by his side, keeping him company despite his enduring silence.

Soulburner was impatient to go look for Playmaker and bring him back to the net, the only thing stopping him was having to wait for Lightning's order to leave, he couldn't do it without his supervision, he also had to meet with Playmaker in a certain specific time. He would only have three hours to find Playmaker and ask about his decision.

To pass time, he stood by in his room, as he always did. Playing boringly with the flames his avatar could create. Igniting the fire then extinguishing it.

He didn't like to tour the castle alone, it was such a spacious place for very few people, everything felt too lonely. Flame knew he felt that way and that's why he came to make him company.

Although Soulburner hadn't asked him, he didn't need it either. There was only one company that would be enough for him.

Flame knew this too.

Flame knew he wasn't enough.

"Perfect for whom?

Flame's sudden question surprised Soulburner, causing him to turn off the burning flame on his palm by closing it in a fist. "For everyone, Flame," he answered firmly.

"Or for you?"

"I know it will be for Playmaker too," he said, frowning with some concern in his eyes as he felt his Ignis was beginning to question his choices "What's the matter with you, Flame?"

Soulburner laughed nervously, trying to calm himself down. He was already worried about whether Playmaker wouldn't accept his proposal, and to think that Flame might turn his back on him, had him desperate.

Flame shook his head slightly and changed the seriousness on his face to a comprehensive smile.

"Nothing, I also feel restless. It's not easy to share the room with Windy" he muttered the latter, rubbing his neck wearily.

Soulburner resisted a sigh "I see..."

He felt the pressure of mixed feelings when he heard the name of that Ignis, recalling the anger he felt for what he did to his origin. He could understand why Flame was uncomfortable with his presence, yet he rejected that anger as if forgiving Windy was an order installed in his mind.

He had to force himself to forgive, and so had Flame. Instead of saying something, he just decided to swallow his opinions.

Flame looked at him. He was much more expressive in this human body, Soulburner didn't have much trouble reading him, he realized when Flame's eyes fixed with his and said _I'm worried about you_.

"Are you sleeping well?"

Soulburner blinked as if the question were too silly. “Is not sharing rooms with me troubling you?"

The Fire Ignis sighed "That's one of the reasons"

The boy smiled "It's amazing, Flame. I've never slept so well since... Well, there are no nightmares, no dreams. Nothing to think or worry about."

His gaze shifted to a more melancholic one, looking at the sky again "Except for Playmaker. I haven't stopped thinking about him"

"But that will soon be over"

Flame rested his hand on his origin's shoulder, wanting to comfort him. Flame hated being so sure of his words, yet he kept his real thoughts in the dark.

"I hope you're right, Flame," he replied, turning to his Ignis, resting his hand against the one on his shoulder, receiving his affection.

Their moment of silence was interrupted by someone who pretended to clear his throat. Soulburner and Flame turned around at the same time to see Windy leaning against the balcony entrance, denoting discomfort and perhaps sadness in his face.

"Am I interrupting something?" He asked, and before Flame opened his mouth to answer, Windy continued, "I don't care. Lightning-sama sent me to tell you that you can go out and get your boyfriend," he said vaguely, respectfully naming Lightning only when he was in front of Soulburner.

Windy smirked when he heard Flame’s uncomfortable huff. Perhaps because he referred to Playmaker as the boyfriend of his origin, or because of the way he named Lightning, whatever it was, the outcome satisfied him.

Soulburner seemed to shine when he heard that, yet he nodded calmly "I'll be right there"

"Whatever," Windy replied, discouragement returning to his face.

Flame walked away from Soulburner, hesitating to advance towards the wind Ignis, the intrigue taking over his 'heart', or it was probably concern. He could read on Windy’s face that something wasn't right with him and he needed to talk about it.

But, again, he was interrupted, this time by Soulburner "Windy, I must ask you to come with me"

The two Ignis looked at him, surprised.

"Oh? You know you can't do that, right?"

If Lightning didn't order him to, Soulburner wasn't supposed to take anyone on his journey.

"I know"

"You want to get me in trouble, kid?"

Windy found determination in the human, which caused him to smirk again, like a mischieving teenager disobeying his parents.

"Okay. This place is boring anyways," Windy replied, despite the other's silence, he knew what Soulburner’s serious expression meant. He walked towards Soulburner, standing in front of him "Whenever you want"

Suddenly, they acted like Flame wasn't there. 

"Wait!"

Confusion began to grow inside Flame. He wasn't wondering what Soulburner wanted to do with Windy, but why he had not chosen him to come with him.

Soulburner ignored his Ignis, still looking at Windy, raised his arm and his disc began to glow next to the crystal on the neck of the wind Ignis. Both were wrapped in a data sphere.

"Windy!"

It was the first name his lips let slip when he extended his arm to stop him, but it was too late, both Windy and Soulburner disappeared into the spheres.

~°~

"Well?"

Ai stared at him, on his face of limited gestures Yusaku could see that he was frowning, clearly annoyed and impatient. 

Since he got up, Yusaku didn't say a word, had barely been able to sleep, and woke up with a terrible face.

"Well what?" Yusaku asked vaguely as he finished buttoning his shirt

"What are you going to do? Will you tell Kusanagi?"

"No"

Ai barely noticed that Yusaku had ignored the first question, even so, he insisted "Will you fight Takeru on your own? Don’t you think Kusanagi will notice?"

Ai's desperate voice was beginning to make his head hurt. Yusaku was trying to stay calm because he was already restless enough, and as always, Ai wasn't helping.

One of them had to be the one to think coldly, and it always had to be Yusaku.

"I won't fight Takeru," he answered dryly, starting to put on his tie.

"And how are you going to get him back to his senses? With cuddling and kissing?"

He didn't like the sarcastic tone that his Ignis used at all, mockingly bringing those feelings he tried to hide into the conversation. However, now that he knew Takeru had those feelings too and that he may be too late, his whole world was falling apart.

So Ai's comment caused him to lose patience but it was enough to look at him furiously for the Ignis to hide inside the duel disk.

They remained silent after that, but Yusaku's thoughts and doubts never kept quiet. He walked to school, anxiety rising down his throat and turning into an annoying knot, his gaze was heading to as many corners as possible in search of the person who promised to return for him.

Yusaku wanted to see him, no matter the reason for his return, he just wanted to see his face one more time.

Still…

What would happen once he finds Takeru? How would he respond?

He took a hand to his chest, which hadn't stopped hurting since last night.

The way he had answered the last time they met, made him wonder…

Would Takeru really come back and insist with his proposal? Or would he attack with all his might without giving Yusaku a chance to change his mind?

His determination felt quite fragile since he saw Takeru's memory and felt Takeru’s weakness, the same one he had every night and hid under an expressionless mask and Playmaker's heroism.

Now not only did his chest hurt but his back, as if carrying a heavy backpack. He stopped walking his way to school, vaguely looking at his surroundings, realizing he was right where he met Takeru yesterday.

Yusaku rested his body against a nearby tree, taking advantage of the fact that no one he knew—Shima—, was close enough to appear and interrupt his thoughts. He let himself fall to the grass, hugging his knees.

He stayed hidden under the shade of the tree and the sun could barely reach him, even if he looked up at the sky, the sunlight was hard to find.

He closed his eyes, suddenly feeling very tired. Yusaku couldn't hear the birds singing, nor the breeze hitting the branches of the trees because his mind was a mess of insecurities, horrible memories and fears about his future.

For every cry, every torment he experienced, and every new pain he imagined to live, his body shrunk, his throat tightened, and his eyes burned threatening to release the tears he had long held.

He was afraid.

Too afraid.

He felt tired.

"Yusaku…"

He didn't know when he had hidden his face into his own arms, that he had to raise his head to meet that voice calling him.

"Takeru,"

Takeru was squatting in front of him, smiling. Yusaku felt his throat dry, his own voice was trembling, as well as his hands that slowly sought to hold on to Takeru's arms.

He forgot his hesitation, lost in that starry look, and the scent that Takeru emanated. Takeru was so warm, he felt safe when he was by his side.

Takeru moved his hand to his cheek "You're crying" he pointed.

Yusaku blinked, felt something fall down his face, he hadn't realized he was crying.

"I don't like to see you like this," Takeru added, still stroking his cheek, "It'll be all right, Yusaku. You just have to rest"

Yusaku shook his head weakly "Takeru…" he tried to argue, but the words did not come out as he wanted. He was about to fall, to give in to Takeru's voice.

He felt strong hands beginning to hold him as if wanting to hug him. "Close your eyes, Yusaku. There's no reason to fight anymore"

Yusaku was about to answer, again his own voice got stuck in his throat, and he only let out a sob while more tears went down his face. His chest tightened, his back hunched painfully allowing him to sink into the chest near him. Takeru's warmth giving him the comfort he needed.

He was tired.

If he closed his eyes, would he rest?

"You'll be okay...," Takeru whispered repeatedly, hugging him as if promising that he would not go anywhere if Yusaku listened to his words.

He just had to close his eyes.

And so he did…

~°~

Flame was eagerly waiting for Soulburner and Windy to return. He needed information—No—he needed to know why Soulburner decided to keep his plan a secret. A plan that involved Windy but not him.

Every second he felt further away from his origin. Their ideals changed completely, they could no longer understand each other with a simple word, or a stare. Soulburner looked different, and he himself felt different.

He was still in the room where Soulburner had left him, touring the castle was useless, if Soulburner connected again, he would detect him.

Time passed, it felt like it was a few hours, the restlessness of his own thoughts and insecurities haunting him. He couldn't stay long in Soulburner's room, imagining him coming with Playmaker in his arms.

No. He couldn’t recognize his origin. He wasn't used to this drastic change yet, nor did he understand it. However, he was constantly fighting to put himself in Soulburner's shoes.

He returned to his room, also empty by Windy's absence. 

Flame dropped himself on the bed, as if his body weighed a ton, let out a heavy sigh, and covered his eyes with the back of his hand.

If he fell into unconsciousness, in what humans knew as sleep, perhaps…

... He would understand Soulburner— Takeru—.

It was as if he had turned off, and really, Flame had not dreamed anything, or perhaps he didn't remember it at the moment he slowly opened his eyes, because someone was touching his face, like a gentle caress.

"Win… dy?"

Definitely, the first thing he saw was a surprised Windy, the hand touching his cheek tensed. 

"Oh-- Wow! I thought you were dead or something" Windy stuttered, his cheeks turning warm as he walked away before Flame found out how close his faces were.

Flame scratched his eyes, feeling light-headed. "No, I was just sleeping."

Windy looked at him in disbelief. "You? Why? We don't need to sleep"

"I do," he answered dryly and then looked at him with suspicion, "Why did Soulburner ask you to go with him?"

The sky had changed colors as if it was about to darken. Even if they were on the net, the place Lightning created imitated the transition of day and night quite well. The reason was unknown, but observing the sky helped Flame determine that he was unconscious for a while.

Windy sat on his own bed, crossing his legs "Oh, now you're the one making questions. Are you jealous because he asked _me_ for help instead of you?"

Flame kept quiet. Then Windy laughed.

"Looks like I'm right! I can't believe you're _that_ kind of guy, Flame"

"I don't trust you!" Flame yelled, ending Windy's fun "If you killed your own origin, I cannot allow you to take advantage of mine"

The poison escaped from his lips, he could notice the pain in Windy's irregular expressions, but, for some strange reason, it was easy for Flame to ignore it. Fury made his fists tremble and become able to utter more hurtful words.

"Tell that to Soulburner, he's the one who asked for my help," Windy replied, standing up and walking towards Flame, "And I don't give a single fuck if I'm worthy of your trust. Kill me if you want to, just try. I put up with you because Lightning wanted it, the same goes for you, even if you don't want to admit it. But if he wasn’t involved, I'd make you swallow your arrogance in less than a second"

His fingers traced Flame's neck, threatening to press his throat, but it was nothing more than that, a vague threat.

The two looked at each other with hatred, though inside they were falling apart.

~°~

Everything was perfect. He felt on balance.

Every time he went back to his room, he wouldn't be alone. Soulburner would see Playmaker resting under his blankets, with that angelic face denoting peace; The one they both looked for.

"Now you're safe, Playmaker," Soulburner whispered, stroking the sleeping boy’s face. He hadn't regained consciousness since he took him to the net.

The first thing he did was take Playmaker into his room and after doing so, he told the Light Ignis. "Lightning-sama knows you're here. Like I told you, everything's going to be okay. The war is over."

Soulburner bent down to kiss Playmaker's forehead. "All that's left is to wait for you to wake up...," he said, smiling, "Then I'll finally feel complete"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you Valmey for helping me. You're awesome ;v;
> 
> Sorry I took so long! Some stuff is keeping me busy :/ 
> 
> That said, thanks for reading!


	5. Secrets in the storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's silence, there's hate.  
> Hatred awakens.  
> A hidden love appears on the storm.  
> And he finally awakes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for leaving kudos and comments! They make me so happy ;v;

_**"Drink the remedy of righteous sight, beat the drum of the poisonous slander** _

_**~°~** _

Blood was overflowing from his mouth, his body was trembling and cold. The rough floor bruised his knees as if his skin was made of paper and what tightened around his neck restricted his strength. He had never experienced this fragility and found it unacceptable.

He couldn't surrender to his weakness, to whatever weakening which caused this unbearable dizziness and painful palpitations every time he tried to raise his head to see his torturer. Perhaps it was more painful to analyze the context in which he was than the damage that tore him apart.

His steps were firm, he had memorized the noise those made on the few occasions he’d heard him approach. Would he finally talk? It wasn't one but two sets of steps this time. The first walked heavily, but his movements were light, he leaped and shook his hands; the other, who came by every now and then, tried to appear imposing. It almost came naturally to him with the hatred emanating from his violence.

That former was the one he was interested in the most, though he could do nothing but observe for now. He did the best he could to hold his gaze and look at his starry eyes, it was the first time they looked at each other like this, but all he remembered were the flames that at some point occupied the place where the light now resided.

"Soulburner..." his voice was hoarse and he was surprised he could hear himself at all.

Soulburner smiled. A cruel smile that didn't fit well with his face. "And Takeru Homura, that’s a name I'll soon forget, but you won't" he replied.

The boy leaned over the chained man, taking his chin with such force that it felt like he was going to break his jaw "You will not forget me, _Revolver_ "

~°~

Whenever Soulburner decided to visit Revolver, he didn’t get close. When that happened, Windy walked aimlessly through the castle corridors in Lightning’s area, pretending that nothing was happening on another side of the net that was hidden. Soulburner told him that Lightning shouldn't know, and personally, knowing what this was all about, he wouldn't want Lightning to know either.

Having his revenge on Revolver was his greatest desire and sharing such with Flame's origin was something he didn’t want to miss. Until now Lightning hadn't given him that possibility, so he didn't refuse when Soulburner told him his plan. Although Windy had to do all the dirty work, he was content with finally making Revolver pay for what he did.

He couldn't help but grin every time he remembered Revolver looking so messed up and humiliated, chained in that dark, damp corner, his naked avatar showing off the scars and bruises that they were leaving on him. Now he looked like nothing more than a pitiful human, what he had always been. Revolver was no longer in a position to mock him.

Soon it would be worse, much worse.

He let out a giggle that resonated in the corridors, not knowing he wasn't alone. "What's so funny?"

Windy’s smile faded into a startled face that quickly changed before turning to see who was behind him. Luckily it was just Flame, if it had been Lightning—he hated to admit—he'd be in trouble.

"Not you, definitely"

Windy shrugged, showing indifference to those eyes that seemed like they wanted to analyze him.

Flame arched an eyebrow and crossed his arms. Annoyed by the clear suspicion that was noticeable in his face, Windy imitated him "Stop looking at me like that" he pouted.

"How do you want me to look at you if I know you're hiding something from me? And not just you, also Soulburner"

"It's not like we have to tell you everything," the Wind Ignis hummed, approaching him with little jumps to touch the tip of Flame's nose "Unless we need you, but no one needs you, Flame"

Windy smiled maliciously, knowing that this would annoy the fire Ignis. Yet it didn't matter how many times he felt annoyed, he wouldn't walk away. Windy wasn't sure why he wanted Flame to be mad.

"Soulburner needs Playmaker, he should be by his side, but he's not," Flame kept a serene voice, despite the obvious pain expressed on his face "Do you know anything about that?"

Windy stopped smiling. Playmaker should’ve woken up days ago but he didn’t, Lightning said nothing, and Soulburner just kept waiting for him, impatience getting heavier every day, aggressiveness increased in his gaze, and he released that frustration against Revolver. Windy noticed that it was no longer just revenge, and Flame could probably feel the same way, even though he didn't know what was going on.

He tried to shake those thoughts. What Soulburner and Flame felt shouldn't matter to him. He had to worry about himself and his own desires, because no one would do it for him, not even Lightning.

"Windy...," Flame insisted, "You suddenly got silent"

Windy took a few steps away, painfully clenching his fists "And why do you care?!"

"He's my partner, I can't let him…"

"Then you're only coming for Soulburner...," he murmured, "Ask him, I'm not his messenger"

"I don't need to ask him anything"

Flame noticed that Windy startled after hearing this, anger changing to a more helpless look. "What do you mean?"

"Soulburner told Playmaker not to worry about anything, that he would do justice. That the culprit would burn in the flames of his punishment"

Silence. Windy swallowed heavily, Flame could swear he saw a drop of sweat falling down his temple, the laugh that Windy shot out couldn't hide the paleness that tinged his skin. 

His laugh sounded desperate. Windy was scared.

"Your origin is insane, Flame! Make sure it's not contagious" Windy patted him carefree on his shoulder as he passed him by. 

Without moving, without looking at him, Flame replied, "You too, take care"

Windy stopped his steps, inevitably releasing a gasp "No one knows more about how to take care of themselves than me"

"No comments on that" Flame chuckled, though his smile was sad, Windy couldn't see him. They were both turning their backs "Don't let Soulburner do something he might regret"

Finally, the Wind Ignis turned, frowning "I'm not his fucking babysitter! You're his Ignis! What are _you_ doing?"

Flame didn't respond, causing Windy to laugh again, pretending to be hurtful.

"I see. Sorry, Flame. What do I get in return? I've been waiting for this all my life, and your origin needs _me_. Not _you"_ he let out another chuckle, "He asked me to make that space on the net to hide Revolver, and I'm the one who's going to kill him because I can give that power to Soulburner"

Windy wanted to hurt Flame, break him completely, and he was starting to make him feel useless, he knew that was his weakness and he was happy to discover it. He didn't mind giving himself away so openly, he just wanted to break him.

_BreakBreakBreakBreak_

"You don't understand, Flame! You'll never understand! That's why Soulburner stopped trusting you"

His laughter became erratic, resonating all over the place.

Lightning could hear him.

_Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up_

"I'm creating a virus... do you want to be my test subject?" He whispered, hugging him from behind "I can eliminate you before anyone else, maybe then you'll stop being so upset," he bit his ear slightly "Tell me, Fla…"

"Don't touch me!"

Flame pushed him hard, causing Windy's back to hit the wall abruptly. Before Windy could respond, the Fire Ignis cornered him, taking him by the neck of his messy cloak "I won't let you kill anyone else!"

An intense light burned in Flame's eyes and it seemed to want to destroy Windy just by looking at him. That light was similar to Soulburner's and Lightning's, but…

No, it looked more like a fire that would burn him if he kept coming closer. 

_Anyone else, huh?_ Windy repeated in his head, trying to remember the moment when he laid his hands on his own origin; trying to remember when he decided he would never need him.

Flame was too attached to humans. He didn't understand anything.

_He doesn't understand._

"You should stop me then, shouldn't you?"

Windy's thin hands took Flame's wrists, trying to be stronger than his grip. The two were surprised when they realized he was shaking.

Was he scared?

Suddenly, Flame's strength decreased, and the light in his eyes went out, leaving his natural glow, his serenity and…

… his sorrow.

Windy shook his head and took advantage of this to put away the hands that held him "Don't touch me again"

He pushed him to make space and walk away, even if he didn't know where he was going.

He just wanted to get away from Flame—No—to keep him away from his instability.

He didn't walk too far, though, as Lightning soon stood in front of him, blocking his path.

~°~

Soulburner only knew two paths. To his room shared with Playmaker and to that dark corner Windy created for him and Revolver. It was curious how his heart—if it still existed—beat in a different way when he was in each place.

He looked at Playmaker and smiled, happy. It was just like when he watched him sleep in class, he just waited for him to open his eyes and then he knew he had to look away, because Yusaku—No—Playmaker didn't like to be stared at when sleeping, or to be woken up. He just had to sit back and wait.

Then they'd be fine. Playmaker would be fine. He'd be fine.

But Playmaker didn't open his eyes, so he had to punish the culprit. He kept smiling about it.

Revolver was right where he wanted him. He'd make him pay for all his nightmares, his tears, his screams, his illness.

His parents. Playmaker...

Playmaker would be happy. His parents, too.

Everything, absolutely everything...

... He'd do it for them.

"So, wake up, Playmaker. Please"

He laid down beside him, taking Playmaker's cold hand. Playmaker's suit was dark and cold, he would soon change it, that's what he decided before closing his eyes, without falling into the darkness of dreams and nightmares, he just turned off his gaze and rested.

The only dream he'd have would be of Playmaker waking up and his emeralds shining with a blinding light.

It felt like blinking, he couldn’t notice time running in his sleep, he could only recognize the darkened sky with no stars to brighten their place. Sometimes there were, sometimes not.

Soulburner ignored this. The night was no longer something he should fear, he was safe with Playmaker. Nothing else mattered.

As if Playmaker had listened to his thoughts, he gently squeezed his hand. It was not difficult for Soulburner to wake up quickly, and to look at the boy's face. Playmaker felt confused and frowned as if waking up was painful.

Soulburner just wanted to see his eyes open. He wanted a look that would light up the night.

However, Playmaker's eyes were as dull as ever, still lost in the darkness of his own self, he noticed when Playmaker ended up sitting abruptly in bed, desperate to recognize where he was, and strangely pronouncing a name that felt alien to him

"Ai!"

Playmaker gasped as if his lungs failed, painfully pressing Soulburner's hand, not recognizing what he was holding until he blinked and turned to look at the person next to him. Soulburner smiled when their eyes met, but Playmaker didn’t smile back "You woke up" Soulburner said as if he didn't have to explain anything.

"Where…?"

_... are we? Is Ai here? What the hell do you want to ask, Playmaker?_ Soulburner asked in his mind, chewing on his frustrations and focusing on the happiness it brought him to see Playmaker finally awake.

"There's nothing to worry about, now we're safe"

Soulburner stroked the other's cheek, smiling sympathetically.

Playmaker shook his head, loosening the grip on Soulburner's hand "I had a nightmare"

Playmaker was very surprised to say this as if it were not what he meant to say.

"Playmaker, if you want that to end, you have to give me an answer"

Seeing that Playmaker was having trouble responding, opening and closing his mouth, looking for words like his lips forgot how they should move to pronounce them, Soulburner decided to give him a little more time. He dared to lean in and kiss his cheek, startling Playmaker.

"Later then," he whispered, "I waited a long time for you to wake up, and I…"

He went up to kiss his temple too "I just want to spend the night with you. Then I'll let you process everything that happened, but now, I want you to grant me this wish"

Playmaker could hardly think, Soulburner's words entered his head, echoing without giving him a chance to refuse. He wouldn't refuse anyways. He didn't know what was going on, he still struggled to incorporate the information, and his heart was throbbing with intensity as he noded to Soulburner's request.

"I promise you, if you close your eyes, I will be by your side to protect you from nightmares. Protecting you is all I want"

His arms surrounded a confused Playmaker, wrapping him in a warm embrace. 

A violent thunder resonated outside, startling Playmaker, causing him to hold on to Soulburner as if acknowledging that he was his safe place. And maybe he was, just for that night.

~°~

Heading to the room he shared with Windy, the clear skies began to fade, the day suddenly turned into night, as it was the only way to control the schedule Lightning had made for them and that they had to follow as if they were normal humans living under one roof. Flame couldn't understand why someone like Lightning would want to pretend that the night existed, or that it could rain as it was now, perfectly simulating the works of nature.

The storm was heavy and the sound of water droplets hitting the large windows was annoying to his ears. However, the sobs and heavy gasps he heard as he entered the room didn’t escape his ears, those came from Windy's bed.

There laid a lump under the blankets, which sadly reminded him of Takeru.

Thunder struck violently outside and it felt like it could break the windows, but only made them tremble slightly. The lump in bed cried in fear and stirred quite a bit.

"Windy...", Flame called him gently, as he sat in the small space left in the bed so he could uncover the hidden body.

He quickly understood what was going on. 

"Fla... Flame"

Windy looked at him, frightened, tears shining on his face. Flame shuddered, noticing the lack of light on his eye and how the angry red changed to a soft lilac. He thought it was the effect of the night’s darkness, but, when Windy sat down, clinging to the blankets, he could see his eye better.

It seemed that the Wind Ignis was about to say something until another violent thunder made any kind of conversation impossible. "Flame!" Windy sobbed, hugging him.

Immediately, Flame surrounded him with his arms, trying to give him the comfort he was looking for.

"Calm down, Windy. It's just thunder. It's okay," he whispered, stroking his hair. He felt weird doing this, he always wanted to do something similar for Takeru when he had his nightmares, yet his body never allowed him.

Now, Takeru didn't need him.

Windy clung much more to Flame, trembling as if he was freezing, and sobbing, drowning with his own desperation. "Help me...," he pleaded, "It's my punishment. I don't want to be punished"

Flame frowned, confused "Punishment?" He asked, continuing his caresses.

"Lightning punishes me for acting behind his back, or for being a loser. I don't know!" Windy answered nervously, feeling like just saying that would get into more trouble.

So, that's why he cared to simulate this weather, the darkness that for humans symbolized a specific schedule but for them, the Ignis, meant nothing. Except for Windy, who was afraid of thunder and darkness.

"I'm here, I'm not going to leave you alone"

He took Windy's face and stared at him, wiping away the tears that fell down his soft cheeks. He hadn't realized how fragile Windy really was.

Until now.

But Windy hated looking like this, and that part of him began to wake up as red slowly covered the faint lilac of his eye "Sure…" he mumbled, before suddenly pushing himself back to the blankets and pillows that protected him better than Flame's arms, or so he wanted to believe "As if you cared"

"I care about you, I always cared about you"

"And where were you when that virus was killing me?!" Windy shouted suddenly, roaring along with an aggressive thunder from outside, "Ah, right. You were watching"

Red completely took over Windy’s gaze, the hatred stood out in its brightness, but sadness remained as well as fear "I deserve this punishment, for turning my back on the only one who showed interest in me"

Flame could see the golden light reflected in his eye, and his insides shook in anger "Lightning was letting you die! It was Ai who...!"

"Why was it Ai?!" Windy sat down again to face Flame "Why was it not you?"

He didn't want to keep crying, yet he had started to cry again. The light flashed weakened, wishing to turn off. Windy's head fell on Flame's chest. "I want you to realize, Flame"

Another thunder made him tremble, and Flame did not hesitate to hug him. He wouldn't freeze in doubt as he did before.

Flame could never forgive himself for what happened to Windy.

Flame raised Windy's chin, though Windy turned his face so as not to face him with tears, the fire was ignoring this and only pulled the wind to kiss his lips.

It was short, soft but intense. Windy wanted more, however…

"Are you going to back down?" Windy asked and giving Flame no time to answer, he kissed him again, deeply, "I'm won’t allow it"

He wrapped his arms around his neck and dragged Flame to be on top of him. He couldn't hear the rain or thunder anymore; he didn't look at the shadows or the rays.

It was just him and Flame. As it always should have been.

"Let yourself go…"

It was the last thing he whispered before letting them both surrender to the comforting heat they released.

~°~

"Playmaker woke up"

Lightning could feel it, someone connecting to his network, and that strong presence could only be Playmaker. He didn't need to ask Soulburner or Windy to find out. "He took his time, but he is here to stay"

He was sure of his own words.

"Doesn't that make you happy? I was able to gather your friends"

He turned to look at Jin, half his face covered and his eyes as dull as ever. "Why don't you smile? Oh, right"

He put his finger on his neck enclosing his mouth, a small shower of data revealed the open area, fully showing the face of his origin. The pursed lips, his stiff jaw, and his eyes as cold as the breeze of the treacherous storm. No sigh ended his silence.

"I should give you permission to express yourself however you want...," he whispered as he passed his finger along the line of his lips, "You promise not to try to kill yourself like last time?"

Jin didn't move a muscle. Lightning didn't expect him to actually do it.

"Good"

A golden glow enveloped the boy, making him smaller and loud. The clothes that weighed him disappeared, Jin was showing himself in the pajamas he was wearing when Lightning took him away.

The boy blinked, it didn't take too long for him to express bewilderment and fear, he just gasped and groaned slightly at the same time as his slender body trembled unstoppably. The Light Ignis had already seen him in this situation, and faced his cries and despair, he was waiting for Jin to get there again but he was taking long to even start crying.

Jin was just looking at Lightning from head to toe "Who...? Who?" he pronounced frightened, taking a few awkward steps back, causing him to fall to the ground.

Lightning didn't move because of this, he stayed in position "My name is Lightning, We've already had this conversation," he replied, "Since you're behaving better than last time, I will grant you a single request"

Of course, he wouldn't keep his word, he knew that the first thing Jin would ask would be to go home, breaking away from his forced loyalty.

Jin covered his ears and closed his eyes tightly, perhaps making an effort to answer all the questions that appeared on his head. He opened his mouth, about to say something else, but a violent thunder interrupted him.

Curiously, the thunder didn't scare him, it just caused him to turn his gaze out to the window with ... Interest. Lightning analyzed him very carefully, and when he didn't get an answer, he asked, "Do you want to go outside?"

Jin turned to look at him, more surprised than startled.

"If I do that, you won't be able to ask me for anything else," he added, extending his hand, hoping Jin wouldn't take it. To his surprise, his origin not only accepted his hand, but he also didn’t take too long to do so. 

He helped him stand up and guided him to the garden. He found it difficult to let go when the boy kept walking into the rain, his gaze fixed on the sky, looking like he wanted to be carried away by the stormy clouds.

The light Ignis snapped his fingers, manipulating lightning to hit the ground near Jin. But the boy didn't scream or back down.

"So that's what it's all about...," he observed, approaching his origin without caring about getting completely wet as well. He took off his coat to cover the soaked boy as if he was worried that Jin's body was getting wet. He could just stop the rain, but if he did that, Jin would be unhappy.

Lightning felt like Jin had barely noticed his presence until Jin reached out for his hands and interlaced their cold fingers before giving him a faint smile.

Lightning smiled back at him. "At last you appreciate my actions"

He gently squeezed his origin’s hand.

"Because, in the end, everything I do…

... I'm doing it for you, Jin"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Couldn't help but add some LightJin here. Oops!
> 
> Thanks for reading, but more than anything, thanks to Valmey as always for helping me.
> 
> See ya!


	6. The lovers that went wrong

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His eyes are still the same.  
> His hopeful heart feels betrayed.  
> The fire is cursed by the dependent breeze.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's back!
> 
> Sorry for being late with the update, I've been busy and didn't had the brain to work on this story
> 
> Thank youuuu as always to Valmey for beta reading this!  
> And to you guys for waiting.

> **_"Radiating, its wonderful halo glows in the dark, similar to the dream of the heron that flies in unlimited space, similar to the immobile lagoon in a luminous autumn"_ **

**_~°~_ **

****

The sun shone painfully into Flame's eyes, he’d never felt his eyelids heavy enough to be hard to open, or his body so rigid that getting up seemed like a bad idea. The light forced him to close his eyes, even so, he insisted on fighting against that brightness and opened them to observe his surroundings.

The first thing he could recognize was his bed, well set and shrouded in the gold of false sunlight. He was taken aback when he realized that he was lying down, but not exactly on the bed that belonged to him, then he remembered what happened last night and where he was.

It hadn't been just a dream. Windy was hugging him, the two of them naked under the covers, proving that what he remembered was part of reality. He could still feel it and the more he thought about it the less he believed it, he wasn't displeased with what he did, but he wasn't happy either.

"You know, now I understand why you like sleeping so much."

Windy was looking at him with that reddish orb and a smile decorating his face, his arms encircling his torso and his cheek resting on his chest. "But I'm not going to make it a habit." he blew a strand of his greenish hair.

Flame chuckled, helping him move the hair that was bothering him with light caresses "I wonder if you dreamed something"

Until now, Flame had not yet discovered what dreams and nightmares were in their entirety, he was unable to describe the scenarios and illusions that he witnessed when he fell into rest. What would Windy's dreams be like? And his nightmares?

Windy blinked, blushing at the way Flame touched him. He was treating him too gently. "Yeah, I dreamed something," he muttered shyly.

"You're not going to tell me, are you?"

"Nope!"

He pulled his hand away from Flame to settle on top of him, sitting on his lap.

These vivid sensations between each touch were new and at the same time, addictive, especially for Windy. "You must learn to respect other's secrets ..." He winked his eye playfully, leaning towards Flame's face. "Like the one you have with me now ~"

Windy kissed his chin, inhaling his scent. "These bodies weren't such a bad idea after all," he commented with some grace.

Perhaps it was curiosity that diverted Windy’s attention to a completely foreign subject. What did Lightning smell like? Flame carried the relaxing scent of sandalwood, mixed with metal, as if he were a scented chain. The last time he was near Lightning he could recognize the subtle scent of lemon.

It was hard to imagine them wearing another fragrance now that he had incorporated them as his own, even if they exchanged, Flame would stop being Flame and Lightning would not be Lightning. Each had his own essence.

What was his?

He wanted to laugh at that stupid thought. If Lightning heard him, he would scold him, telling him that he was only being influenced by the new senses that had been installed in his system. As if he were a computer. Yes, they were. Why did he think about it so much?

Not only that…

Why was he thinking of Lightning when he was with Flame as he had wished?

Trying to shake him out of his mind, he kissed Flame’s lips, more out of selfish desire than out of showing his feelings to Flame — how did he feel about Flame?—.

Flame responded to his kiss, with the same passion as last night, the one that told him without telling him that everything was under control, that as long as Flame held him like now, he would be under control.

His hands slid down his back, causing a noticeable shudder in Windy that he resisted with a heavy sigh. Flame was also impressed with the possibilities that these bodies offered them, however, his attention was scattered, since he still did not assimilate what he had done with the Wind Ignis, nor the decisions that Soulburner made.

Windy was right …

What was he doing for his origin?

"I could use a repeat of last night," Windy whispered playfully.

That voice pierced his ear and spread throughout his insides in a horrible, uncomfortable way, several screams asked him not to accept such a proposal that would only drag him into the manipulative distraction. A famous forbidden temptation. Flame shook his head. "Too bad I don't have time for that."

Windy opened his eye as if he had expected any answer but that. "We have all the time in the world, Flame," he replied, feeling like he was stating the obvious. Flame didn't say anything, he just looked away and growled, a growl that for Windy meant that everything was still going relatively wrong. "Stop being so boring, okay?"

Without waiting for another answer, he reached over to kiss him again, until Flame placed his hand over his mouth to stop him. Flame's hands were warm but his act was quite cold.

It was Windy's turn to growl, frowning deeply, jerking the hand that blocked the way for his words, "What the hell is wrong with you now? You still don't forgive me?"

"I just can't stand you being so frivolous. Soulburner is …"

"Oh! Is that what happens ... Flame~chan is still worried about his little boy, right?" He uttered with a mocking tone, pinching the other's cheek before laughing mischievously. "He already let you go long ago, why don't you do the same?"

The fire Ignis gave him a look of noticeable annoyance. "How dare you tell me that and then expect me to forgive you?"

Windy didn't erase his smirk, and just hugged Flame's chest. "You just don't realize you've just slept with the best of advisers."

Flame rolled his eyes, sighing irritably. "You don't understand"

He tried to move Windy so he could get out of bed, but he seemed to be glued to him. "You're the one who doesn't get it," Windy muttered, looking up to smile at him. An oddly understanding smile "But that's okay, you don't have to understand everything so soon, Flame"

The wind one brought his lips to the characteristic red crystal of Flame's SOLtiS. Flame could feel as if a wave of data was blowing inside his chest, rising to his head. Then, he realized that Windy had transferred something to him.

"Did you just …"

"It's the address where we hide Revolver, I'll let you know when Soulburner decides to see him, so you can go too," Windy's voice sounded calm. He didn't care about the risk if it was Flame "And the time will come when you will look me in the eye, and tell me: 'you were right, Windy'" he added while leaving a trail of kisses on Flame's chest. .

His voice blowing against his skin was so absorbing, that he could barely focus on the alarming situation that might await him.

Windy raised his head. "But for now, can we do it again? Before you get angry and I can no longer enjoy you"

Flame frowned, unsure of what was right at the time, forgetting the importance of their discussion and falling into Windy's frivolity. He closed his eyes and sighed, saying nothing. Windy took it as a nod.

"Perfect," he murmured, going back to what he was doing, painting every part of Flame's body with his kisses, slowly descending.

~°~

"Yusaku …"

The boy shifted in his arms, complaining at the voice that insisted him to open his eyes. He was too tired, couldn't he let him sleep?

"Yu~sa~ku~"

But that voice was important to him, and if he called out to him, he couldn't refuse to look at him. With difficulty he raised his head, feeling the sun burn his eyes, it only took a few blinks for his vision to clear and he could meet who was smiling at him like every day.

"Good morning, Yusaku"

Yusaku scratched his eye in exhaustion. "Takeru …"

"Takeru wouldn't stop watching you sleep, until he got tired of waiting for you to wake up," he heard Flame say, though he couldn't find him anywhere.

"It's true," Takeru admitted without a hint of embarrassment, as Yusaku would have imagined.

Yusaku, on the other hand, swallowed nervously, averting his gaze, pretending to ignore the heat on his cheeks. "I'm sorry," he murmured

"Why? I'm not ashamed to say it, I like to see you sleep but I also want you to open your eyes and realize that I'm still here, even if I don't stand in front of you"

"I'm sorry to keep you waiting," Yusaku continued almost immediately, processing the words Takeru dedicated to him. He heard himself so insecure and shy compared to Takeru, who he seemed to know both what he was saying and what Yusaku would answer.

"You don't have to reciprocate, Yusaku. It's not too difficult to give me an answer either, is it?" He sounded annoyed. "Do you care enough about me?"

The answer was “yes” but from his mouth came: "I-I don't know."

Takeru closed his eyes, there was not a minute in which his smile faded, even so, his gestures were so alive that it was easy to recognize when he lost his patience. "Of course you don't know."

Yusaku panicked seeing Takeru rise from his seat, ready to turn his back on him. "Wait!" he exclaimed, hugging him to hold him back. "I was scared… I couldn't tell you what you meant to me because… I was terrified," he confessed, his feelings sliding down his tongue.

He sighed in relief as soon as he felt Takeru's arms wrap him in a warm welcome. "It's okay, Yusaku," he whispered, "There is a place where fears fade, and we will have all the time to ourselves, so we will not wait for nothing to come. Without time, there is no waiting"

Takeru kissed his head. "Open your eyes, Playmaker," he said. "And look at the sun."

Without hesitating too much, Yusaku obeyed his words, hardly pulling away from Takeru to move his eyelids that had suddenly become quite heavy, and again the warm glow of the sun complicated the opening. But when he managed to clear his vision again, he noticed that he was in another place, it was no longer the classroom where he had been a few seconds ago, and Takeru was not with him.

Rather, it was Soulburner and he was Playmaker, yet they were still holding each other, like in that dream.

"Good morning, Playmaker," the boy smiled at him.

Playmaker stayed confused, but that would not discourage Soulburner, not because he was hopeful, but because he was blinded by the certainty that Playmaker would give in to what he defined as the right path. The path by his side.

"I…" Playmaker began, trying to assimilate what was happening.

Soulburner brought his finger to the other's lips to stop whatever he was going to say, which surely wasn't good. "Lightning-sama will want to see you soon, meanwhile, could we take a walk?"

Playmaker's eyes widened, a series of situations reappeared in his memory.

_Yusaku, are you busy ?; I thought we could do something together; It's okay. It will be in another chance._

He listened to Takeru offer him a moment to hang out and relax together. He always unconsciously found a way to reject him, even if he didn't want to, he considered that he wasn't a great companion, that he wasn't a great friend for Takeru. He never analyzed why he insisted so many times, in such a way that it remained in his rejection.

If he said no now, the chain would never break.

"Okay," he nodded vaguely, and although he didn't show much emotion, for Soulburner it was enough.

Soulburner took his hand, leading him out onto the balcony. The sun felt so comforting and there was a nice breeze. Everything was in perfect harmony, making Soulburner smile pleased without much effort, caressing the knuckles of his beloved Playmaker.

Playmaker was surprised at how real the outside felt, as if it were not a bunch of data that made up the falsehood of that nature that presented before his eyes. Not even the animals were alive.

A bird was perching on the railing, approaching his hand that was resting there.

The emerald-eyed one was lost in their songs, he couldn't help extending his finger and scratching the bird's head. If it had been an ordinary bird, it would have been scared and flown away from them, perhaps he was going crazy and imagined that the bird was staring at him, inviting him to fly next to them. The bird allowed to be petted by the boy, before finally spreading its wings and heading towards the trees.

"He'll come back if I ask him," Soulburner mentioned, still looking at Playmaker. "I can give you ... anything you want."

Hearing this, the boy flinched. "Soulburner…"

"If you want to fly, we'll fly together."

Soulburner put one foot on the railing, leaning forward, hopping quite ready to fall off said balcony, worrying Playmaker.

"Soulburner!" He exclaimed desperately, as if falling off a balcony was going to hurt him in this world.

He hurried to look under the balcony only to find Soulburner ascending to his height again, positioned atop his D-Board. "Come on. Everything will be fine.” he extended his hand to the emerald-eyed one, who seemed to be still processing everything that was happening in front of him.

Without thinking too much, he took his hand. Soulburner pulled him to make him jump onto the board, maybe it was because he didn't control this very well or he had done it on purpose, but the movement was sloppy, causing Playmaker to trip and cling to Soulburner so as not to fall off the board.

It didn't take long for Playmaker to regain his balance, although it was strange to share the D-Board, he would allow this new, warm feeling of being around Soulburner.

He intertwined his fingers, and Soulburner took this as an indication that he agreed to continue, so he held on to Playmaker as unnecessary as it was, before the D-Board moved forward.

They flew around the palace, but away from it, since Soulburner didn't want Lightning to find out and interrupt their moment. He was so happy that any presence other than that of his beloved Playmaker would be a complete nuisance.

Nothing would disturb them, or drive them away again. They would be together forever, flying with the freedom of a heron.

Playmaker felt the strong breeze hit his cheeks, the scent of petrichor lingering even though the land and sky showed that a storm had never happened. The weather was clear, calm, and bright. Not in all the times that he flew on his D-Board had he felt this lightness.

The reasons were obvious.

Where had all his worries gone? Perhaps those were next to the birds that were still flying too far from them, and that suddenly, little by little they were approaching, flying in circles to surround them while Soulburner stopped the board. Soulburner smiled, knowing full well that the birds would do that.

Playmaker didn't understand the workings of this strange nature, but he was not trying to do so either, because he was losing himself in the light of Soulburner's eyes, which entered him with too much warmth.

They were close enough now, there wasn't a step their feet could take to break the distance that existed between their faces. Soulburner wanted to close this distance, would Playmaker want the same?

He caressed his cheek, thinking carefully about it. "Playmaker…" he whispered, the insecurity reappearing in his heart, the thousands of doubts that had led him to stop his confession when he was only Takeru Homura.

Could he say it? Prove it?

Likewise, it seemed that his lips could not utter other words. It was not an 'I love you', 'I like you' or a kiss as he would have liked to express so much. It was a more intense promise that had so far driven them away.

"Will you stay with me?"

It was the first time since he had decided this that he had seen Playmaker out of his confusion but then it returned like an illness he couldn’t get rid of. "Soulburner…"

"I can't wait much longer."

Soulburner sounded desperate, that was not his intention. Playmaker felt that he was reliving that dream, and again remembered why he was so upset. He dropped his gaze, and brought it to his feet, inevitably meeting his arm that was holding his empty duel disk.

His deck wasn't there, neither was Ai.

He frowned.

Soulburner thought his heart would escape from his chest as soon as he noticed that Playmaker was about to open his mouth.

Would he finally get his answer?

"Soulburner…" he started to say, "What happened to Ai?"

His smile faded, his heart continued to pound, this time with a pressure coming from his frustration. The birds scattered with violent flaps, forcing Playmaker to raise his head.

"He didn't want to come. Just that,” he replied, sounding listless.

"Soulburner?"

The D-Board approached the castle. "I'll take you to Lightning-sama, I won't be able to put it off for long."

_And it wouldn't be convenient either. I want you to leave that unacceptable darkness._ Soulburner kept those words in the privacy of his mind, as he left the beautiful sight of the lightless emeralds.

~°~

Windy knelt in front of him, a smirk playing on his face. "Did you request my presence, Your Majesty?" He deepened his tone exaggeratedly, mocking the seriousness. He tilted his head, closing his eye, and still, he knew that Lightning was looking at him in annoyance.

Lightning didn't ask him what he was doing, he already knew of the mockery that characterized Windy's company, the only one who tried to keep up with the Light Ignis even when he didn't ask him to, nor did he want to acknowledge him. Windy didn't understand Lightning's silence, nor his words, but he could tell when he was criticizing him.

Right now, Windy didn't need to lift his head to see how Lightning was treating him like he was an insolent with just his sparkling eyes looking at him. However, the silence was unbearable, and he broke it with a chuckle as he stood up.

"Anyway, why did you call me?"

Lightning looked him up and down and frowned. "What is that smell?"

Windy swallowed heavy, smelling the scent of sandalwood and metal on him. He thought it it had been only in his imagination. He tried not to dwell on that matter anymore, because it made him feel like Lightning could hear what he was thinking.

He shrugged. "The smell of victory?" He replied, keeping his smirk.

Lightning made that gesture that Windy hated so much, he raised an eyebrow. "Anyway, you'll bring Playmaker to me," he sighed.

The Wind Ignis quickly straightened up and nodded a military salute. Again, mocking. "Yes, my lor...!" He interrupted his performance when he saw Lightning's origin appear behind him and approach him. "What the hell are you doing?"

The question was directed towards Lightning, as if the human in front of him was just a puppet who didn't even obey — because he didn't have the will to do so — but simply moved since Lightning wanted him that way.

Lightning crossed his arms. "He will go with you. I am considering that it would be more convenient for him to remain by your side"

"Well, stop considering it, because it's a bad idea. I can do things on my own, thank you very much"

"I didn't ask for your opinion, Windy. You know that very well"

Windy looked upset, frustration showing in his gaze. "Don't you trust me?"

He knew how hypocritical he sounded, since, if he thought about it honestly, Lightning had no reason to trust him. Now, he was only acting behind his back, not fulfilling any of his obligations. But what guarantee did he have that Lightning wasn't lying to him too?

Lightning moved closer to him, gently cupping his chin to force him to stare at him and lose himself in his light. "You are the one I trust the most. Therefore, I allow Jin to walk beside you"

That had a bitter taste. Windy couldn't help but be annoyed. "So, your origin is more important than me?" He pronounced with a surprising sadness. "Sure, your stuff is always important"

He had almost spat out those words, painfully clenching his fists. Why was he so upset?

"But I'm part of your stuff, right? You use me when it suits you. I realize! And it doesn't bother me!" He clutched his hands to Lightning's clothes, unaware that he was trembling.

Lightning was impassive. "That is true".

"Then protect me! Dammit!"

His yell echoed throughout the room.

"Protect me, as you protect your origin."

"I do not…"

"Don't lie to me!"

Windy had lowered his head by this point, not wanting to see the lack of expressions on Lightning's face as he listened to his call for help, and telling him that he cared little or nothing, that he was just waiting for his tantrum to end to continue with his stuff.

"Would you have let your origin fade into the hands of another human? No one can break him other than you, nothing touches it unless it is your hands. You do that with everything that matters to you. So why did you let the Knights of Hanoi turn me into this warp? Why did Ai have to…?"

Shit, he had started crying and couldn't stop himself, he felt the same way he did last night, with Flame. Unprotected and empty.

He broke off not only because sobs escaped his throat, but because Lightning again forced him to look at him, his eye full of tears.

"I didn't let you die, did I?" Lightning pronounced coldly.

"Would you do it?"

Lightning smiled and leaned in to kiss the Wind Ignis's forehead. "Never"

A lie. Windy thought immediately, even knowing it was a lie, he embraced that answer as if he needed it to live. "I guess I threw this tantrum for nothing," he laughed nervously, pulling away from the Light Ignis at the same time he furiously wiped his tears.

He took a few awkward steps back, still staring at Lightning. The scent of sandalwood mixed with the freshness of the fragrance that Lightning exuded. He opened his mouth, searching for the right words to say, but realized that Lightning didn't want to hear anything else, so he just continued on his way to Soulburner's room, where Playmaker would be.

Every so often he stopped to make sure that Jin continued to follow him from behind.

Windy didn't know why he was suddenly remembering his dream during the silent walk. He had decided to sleep for the first time, because he thought that that way he would better connect with Flame.

In the dream, he was in a bed of daffodils that was slowly burning. The fire forgot that there was a body among the flowers, and continued to burn him until the entire garden turned to ashes along with him. He relived the painful sensation of the virus breaking through every bit of his data, tearing off what they would call skin, his entire body melting away in the poison of hatred and destruction.

There was no light to save him, only the fire was there to make him tremble, taking away the beauty of his home.

Thinking of his heartbreaking screams that only he had heard in the flames only made him believe that dreams weren't as beautiful as others used to presume.

If sleeping was like this, he’d rather not turn off his lights again.


	7. A lifeless face

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone he'll soon forget will feel the burn of his hatred.  
> The pain doesn't know who are their enemies.  
> A gift in his room will have his name, even if he won't remember it.
> 
> Let's wish for him to never exist, so the light would be proud.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, this is my favourite summary.
> 
> Thank you Valmey for your beta reading!!!

> **_"Only this silence is the last teaching, only this light is the universal response, the effortless response, the inaudible teaching"_ **

**_~°~_ **

It was strange to see him that way, so distant and cold. Perhaps cold wasn't the best way to describe him, because he felt like a latent flame, pretending to be calm but ready to explode at any provocation. Playmaker saw Soulburner that way, when he showed any trace of hesitation or mentioned Ai, he acted as if that annoyed him.

That wasn't the Soulburner he knew, not even his smile was like before. His voice was demanding, although at times it seemed to be an unconscious act. It wasn't Soulburner's fault. The person responsible for all this would soon be in front of him.

"I hope you make the right decision, Playmaker," Soulburner said leading him to the door, ready to reunite him with Lightning, as they had arranged. But he stopped for a moment. "I know you think defeating Lightning is the right thing to do, even so, I'd like you to analyze it, as you do with everything."

He walked away from the door to turn and look at Playmaker. "I can't force you, but I don't want to fight you."

Playmaker stared at him. "Then don't make me do it."

"You neither"

Without further ado, Soulburner leaned to kiss his lips with the immense affection he professed and the patience he always had for Playmaker.

Playmaker didn't see that kiss coming, however, he didn't act surprised, he responded as if they had already kissed several times as if this was not a sad first kiss. It hurt too much to think that Soulburner's fate; Takeru, whom he loved, was completely in his hands.

Was Soulburner willing to die if the rules called for it?

He didn't want that. He didn't want to lose Soulburner again.

And with that thought, he clung to his arms, deepening that kiss.

Lost they were in that painful union until the door opened, letting in Windy and… Jin.

"I don't want to interrupt your morning love session, but Lightning-sama wants to see Playmaker."

Windy showed his sarcasm and how little care he had for the affection the two in front of him gave to each other. At least, that's how it looked on the outside, anyone who saw his face and body language would first feel his indifference. However, Windy was watching the way Soulburner and Playmaker interacted as if he was discovering something new for him.

He observed that kiss they gave and how much it took them to part. He couldn't help but think of Flame, remembering how his lips felt the first time he kissed him. Was it as sad as Soulburner and Playmaker's kiss?

He didn't want to have that kind of deal with the Fire Ignis. He just wanted to sink into the addictive heat of his intense fire, and nothing more than that. Without commitments, without anguish.

"Jin?"

Playmaker finally moved away from Soulburner, to carefully approach the young boy accompanying the Wind Ignis. The last time the emerald-eyed had seen Kusanagi's younger brother, his mouth was covered as if speaking was forbidden, and his gaze was blank, lost in nothingness. Instead, now, Jin was looking back at him and Playmaker could feel something.

There was life in those eyes.

Jin was still wearing that ornate suit, but his face, even his neck, was released. It was difficult for Playmaker to decide if that was good or bad news.

"Jin, can you hear me? Are you okay?"

Playmaker approached with concern, and Jin took a step back, averting his gaze, showing discomfort.

Although Soulburner continued to feel displaced as soon as Playmaker's eyes focused on Jin, it was not the same annoyance as every time he mentioned Ai. Jin was another matter, since he was Lightning-sama's origin.

"That thing isn't talking yet. I've already tried. So stop wasting your time with nonsense and let's go now,” Windy insisted impatiently only to receive Playmaker's hateful glare.

Soulburner noticed that Playmaker was clenching his fists too tightly, almost as if he was about to hit Windy. That helplessness and rage he knew as his own, the two shared that feeling, or they did once at least. Jin didn't move a muscle when he was treated as a 'thing' even though his emotions seemed to be slightly free.

Maybe it was because he didn't care or just accepted it, if Jin didn't complain, then neither he nor Playmaker had the right to complain about it.

As he thought about it, his gaze met Playmaker's. Playmaker was so firm when he looked at him, that no matter how much power Soulburner felt in his hands or if his back was wider than his, he would never be able to overcome that strength that characterized Playmaker, and that right now was dangerous.

He knew what it meant for Playmaker to look at him that way. Playmaker wasn't waiting for him to do something, he never expected it, but he was sending the message that he was going to fight.

Why? Wasn't he reason enough to stop?

No. That wasn't a reason.

Yusaku — Playmaker — was fighting for Jin, and was probably thinking of finding Ai. Because of that, he wouldn't give Lightning-sama space to heal him.

Even after… kissing, Playmaker kept thinking of others. That was something he loved about him, but now it wasn't convenient for him.

"I'll go with you"

Before taking a step close to Playmaker and taking his hand, Jin put his on his chest. Both Soulburner and Playmaker looked at him, surprised.

Windy shrugged. "I guess Lightning… sama wants to see Playmaker only. You could entertain yourself by having tea with… this one.” He pointed dismissively with his thumb at Jin. "Well. Can we go now?" Playmaker didn't even turn to look at Soulburner again, just looked at Windy before walking through the door. Windy rolled his eyes. "No glaring," he added wryly.

The door slammed behind Jin, who didn't take his hand away from Soulburner for a second, and he hadn't noticed because he was quite distracted by Playmaker's distant behavior. His absence, his back in front of his eyes, and the fact that he did not say a single word dedicated to him didn't make him feel more than someone invisible and insignificant.

Playmaker meant everything to him. He had saved his life, in a way, by filling him with hope and joy with a reason to live. But, he didn't mean anything to Playmaker.

He was being pathetic thinking that it would be different, that that kiss was reciprocated feelings. What did that kiss mean? That concern in such beautiful emerald eyes every time he looked at him?

"I really wish I could read minds…" he blurted out aloud, without realizing it.

Then, he became aware of Jin's presence as soon as the purple-haired boy stiffly removed his hand from his chest.

Soulburner smiled slightly at him, sitting on the edge of the bed. "Playmaker never told me about you, and yet he worries like you were his lifelong friend. But you're only Kusanagi-san's brother, who we were supposed to save" he paused for a few seconds, before chuckling nervously "I'm sorry, I shouldn't say 'only'. Jin is Jin, after all. The origin of Lightning-sama"

Jin was barely looking at him, it was hard to make out where his orbs were going with so much brilliance radiating from them. But his pursed lips relaxed at the sound of his Ignis name, and he didn't even notice that he had hunched over enough at the mention of his older brother.

"Maybe we weren't saving you after all." Just like Playmaker thinks he would save me if he fought Lightning-sama, but he would be fighting everyone he had promised to protect"

He chuckled again, shaking his head. The curtains were blowing loudly, the sound of branches hitting each other reminded him that a few minutes ago he had been flying with Playmaker at his side. It all felt like a dream come true.

But it was short-lived. The only one who dreamed of a future with Playmaker was him.

Playmaker had other people in mind.

Jin; Kusanagi-san; Ai…

Even Lightning.

Maybe even Revolver.

His fists trembled, clenching tightly and pulling smoke from the heat that was beginning to emanate from them.

Jin crouched in front of him. He wasn't looking at him, he just reached out his hands and spread his palms over Soulburner's fists, like someone settling in a campfire to warm up. He was even trying to blow hot air out of his mouth and rubbing his palms together, trying to incorporate the heat.

Soulburner blinked in surprise. "Are you cold?"

Jin didn't nod, didn't respond to that. He kept doing his own thing.

Well, it was obvious that the teenager wasn't rubbing his hands over the heat Soulburner released for nothing.

Soulburner got up, careful not to push Jin as he sought to approach the window, and close the doors. The latter hadn't been possible, his fingers brushed the curtains and they were completely burned.

It was true that Soulburner had a very strong desire for destruction hidden in his pain at the indifference he felt from Playmaker, but he hadn't realized this as he was focused on Jin feeling cold.

Jin was standing now, looking at him curiously.

Soulburner stopped counting the times he chuckled stupidly at the Light Ignis' origin. "Whoops?"

With his serious but interested expression, the purple-haired boy extended his palm, and seeing the other boy confused by his vague request, he shook his arm repeatedly, closing and opening his hand.

Soulburner followed suit, only this time, by closing and opening his own hand, he lit a fairly bright flame.

Jin nodded erratically. Few steps ended the long distance between their bodies, Jin's eyes were focused on the fire and his thin hands approached without fearful slowness. Soulburner closed his hand. "Hey! You can burn yourself!"

Jin had ignored him, Jin had an impressive force for how Soulburner had imagined him, and with this same force he forced Soulburner to repeat it, but the fire did not ignite, there were only black and red marks. Burns.

The boy ran his index finger over these marks, causing Soulburner to hiss in pain.

"… ain"

"What?" Soulburner blinked in confusion, more confused by the fact that he heard Jin speak than by his actions.

"Pain"

His voice was soft, yet husky.

"Yes, pain." Soulburner was not surprised by what Jin said. Previously he would have been, today that word had a short distance that led him to the painful thought of Playmaker's silence.

Pain signified his loneliness; his need for having the love he was looking for, to be happy, and for Playmaker to be happy too.

Hearing Playmaker say: I love you, and not thinking that he could say it to Ai, to …

…Revolver.

His burns ached intensely, much more than when Jin had touched him. He didn't complain about it, but the anger was noticeable.

Without having to say anything, Jin released his sore hand, walking out of the room with calm steps. Soulburner's desire for destruction welcomed this silence and absence so he could connect to the other network and pay Revolver a visit.

He extended his arm, closing his eyes and ready to do so with the confidence that no one would look for him; no one would need him, and just when he was convinced, Flame opened the door and entered his room.

Before the Fire Ignis said anything, Soulburner opened his eyes and looked at him. A look he never gave him was now glaring at his partner.

Flame felt that it was part of his imagination, as soon as Soulburner's face changed for a smiling and calm one. "Flame, what happened?"

"That's what I'm here to ask. Has Playmaker made his decision?"

His smile faded. "If he's made it, I don't know. I'm never able to understand what he needs, maybe we just need time.” He shrugged.

"I see…"

"Do you need anything else, Flame?"

The Ignis crossed his arms, arching an eyebrow. "I don't think I've interrupted anything. Are you in a hurry?"

Soulburner tensed. It was difficult to see Flame as his partner right now, everyone around him was his enemies. "I want to be alone. Is it too much to ask?"

"I know you're lying to me."

"Perfect! You can read minds!"

That poisonous, sarcastic tone was not typical of Soulburner, even when he was confident enough to speak haughtily. Flame frowned, concerned. "No. I just know you"

A deathly silence was born in the room, which ended with Soulburner turning his back on his Ignis, willing to get on with what he was about to do, regardless of Flame's presence. "I'm fine, Flame."

"I know you are not. That is why I came"

Soulburner bit his lip painfully. There was a lump in his throat that he didn't recognize, for he didn't remember what it felt like to want to cry until his eyes were dry. That is why he didn't cry.

Takeru would have cried.

"You always know…" he murmured with a strange nostalgia.

Flame smiled softly, feeling that his partner was making way for him to come closer. His eyes looked at every corner of the room, the breeze hitting hard, but before there were curtains to give body to the wind. "What happened to your curtains?"

Soulburner rubbed his eye, like he was wiping nonexistent tears, to look at what Flame was pointing at. He had forgotten he had burn it. Shit, he forgot he was even with Jin a while ago.

"I didn't like them, so I deleted them."

"I see"

Flame saw the lie in that answer but decided to ignore it just this once. The design of the room wasn't Lightning's credit, he gave them white rooms with strong light, perhaps because he did not mind striving for them, or because he did not have the time to show how ostentatious he was for decoration as he did with the rest of the castle. Although both this room and the one he shared with Windy felt like they had a certain part of Lightning.

The slightly wide balcony, the gold-edged framed walls, and the antique stained furniture adorned the site. Flame knew Soulburner added the curtains, the bed for two, useless furniture, and even a vase because he guessed Playmaker would care about all of that. It was a desperation that made him ignore both himself and the people around him.

Soulburner and Playmaker were no different, they never liked the abundant decorations, they didn't even stop to think about it, even if they had time to think about it.

Flame knew this since he had insisted that Takeru give his apartment a little life, with curtains, flowers, and a couple of new furniture. But Takeru simply forgot about it, convinced that no one would visit him to make sure that his surroundings looked good.

Although, Flame was saying it for Takeru, not for other people.

Finishing pondering, he decided to walk to where the curtains were supposed to be, and passing his hand through the air, accumulated data moved, designing and fitting a new curtain. All objects, everything around them, including themselves, were data now, so they could transform their space however they wanted. Flame could give Takeru — Soulburner — whatever he wanted.

Even if he never asked for anything.

Soulburner stared in amazement at what Flame had given him, the curtain was red and at the top were few feathered wings falling along with a rather vivid crimson. Like a Phoenix.

"Flame…"

"It's better than the last one. It will give this place more life" he commented arrogantly.

Soulburner chuckled, and tapped him on the shoulder. "Who told you I was going to leave them"

Flame put his arms on his hips, smiling slyly. "You liked it. You said it, I can read minds"

"That's a lie. I don't like them,"

He kept appreciating the curtains, then his eyes fell on Flame's "I love it"

His smile didn't last long until it turned into one full of sadness because still, his heart wanted to satisfy his need to destroy something ... someone.

And Flame couldn't stop that. Although he took his hand lovingly, as he was doing now.

Soulburner showed guilt on his face as he released him, walking away as if it was burning him, and, in fact, it was. He was holding the injured hand, something that strangely Flame hadn't observed as he did with everything else.

"I want to be alone, Flame, please."

Flame opened his mouth and then closed it. He didn't want to believe that Soulburner was asking him to leave just to let him take out his anger on Revolver, nor did he know if he really needed to be left alone. Before, it would have been so easy to read him and now it was as if he was interacting with a completely different person.

Or maybe Flame was different. Therefore, he left Soulburner alone as requested.

However, he didn't stray from the door, and it didn't take him long to return to the room only to see Soulburner disappear from the place. He clenched his fists, deciding to follow him.

Hoping to be wrong; hoping Windy lied to him.

~ • ~

As soon as he was in front of Lightning, Windy withdrew. Playmaker observed the stiffness in the Wind Ignis despite the feigned relaxed movements of his limbs. But what mattered was who the one in front of him now.

"Why are you doing this?" Playmaker quickly broke the silence.

"Surely you are thinking that this is not a complicated peace treaty" sighed the Light Ignis, before turning and starting to walk down the hall. "Not knowing became something I am willing to get used to for this time. Although it moves away from my comfort, and closer to despair. Like you"

Playmaker swallowed heavy.

"You don't know if this is the right thing to do, you always think you have the correct answer in all your observations. You end up being right sometimes, and being wrong annoys you, even if you don't decide to show it"

"This isn't about me."

"Another correct observation, but in a way," he stopped, turning his head slightly so that he glanced at the human walking behind him. "It's also about you, about all the victims of the Lost case. Even about Revolver"

The emerald-eyed boy frowned, wondering if Revolver was looking for them right now, if he even remembered them. His musings followed, as did his footsteps, on the path to wherever Lightning was leading him.

"The reason for my curious passivity, you shouldn't know, and knowing it wouldn't lead to anything either, because you ..." he smirked "... you need Soulburner's happiness. That is your painful obstacle, the reason you came back. And it's not just that, but you feel lonely"

Lightning couldn't feel the tension in Playmaker's breath, couldn't feel any emotion coming out of him, it was like he was a program without feelings. It was impressive how capable this human was to control himself, so that no one could read his weaknesses. It was just as stimulating that he, the Light Ignis, was able to read Playmaker, for even with his silence, he knew he had hit his wounds.

"You're not used to having friends, and Soulburner, Homura Takeru, was the one who appeared in your life to teach you what you call 'friendship'. You felt powerful, and at the same time, fearful" Lightning shuddered just thinking about it, the wonderful illusion that could be shattered so easily "You were afraid it was part of your imagination. Your loneliness, your sadness; All the suffering that you carry right now, you always carried it on your back and didn't let anyone else do it for you. No one volunteered. Soulburner is giving you a hand, and you're not sure if you should accept it, because you don't know if Soulburner will be able to withstand your pain, or if he would eventually walk away"

Playmaker's breathing grew heavier, and his steps slipped subtly.

"That's why you're both here. There is no pain, there is no darkness. All you wish for, the weaknesses you locked away were released without you noticing. And your horrible memories would turn to dust"

Arriving at their destination. Lightning stopped, Playmaker stopped too.

They were where it all began. Statues of Roman soldiers watched them, perhaps forgetting how one of them pierced Soulburner with his arrow and brought him to this hell disguised as heaven.

"You declared war on us and now you say that you will give us happiness. No, this is all about our memories, you want to delete them. Why? What will happen to people in the real world? With us? With Jin?"

Playmaker noted that, at the mention of Jin, Lightning's shoulders dropped.

"Does it really matter?" Lightning turned around. "It's better not to know"

"For me, if I surrender to your words. But, you are afraid of it, therefore, you are desperate. What will happen if we forget what happened to us?"

Lightning hated that about Playmaker, and at the same time, admired him, how he kept the confidence in his voice despite his own desperation and didn't need to explain too much, because Playmaker already knew the answer to all of his own questions.

"Are you going to fight me, Playmaker?"

The emerald-eyed one was going to answer, however …

I don't want to fight with you

Soulburner's voice echoed in his mind.

His chest ached and his brain made him divert the question to another that strayed from the truth of this whole problem.

"Where is Ai?"

"Ai didn't want to come, so we kicked him off the net."

"What's going to happen to him?"

"Are you really worried about him? He was born out of your suffering and you have done nothing but treat him as a nuisance. I don't blame you, but don't pretend to be a human on our side. If you're still here, it's because you don't have the guts to fight one of yours" Lightning took two of his fingers to his golden strands and stroked it gently, sighing."This bonding thing is ... surprising, and dangerous, right?"

He took a few short steps toward Playmaker, and the same fingers that had previously played with his hair now caressed Playmaker's cheekbone.

Playmaker stared at him, Lightning wasn't moving his lips, and yet, his mind now resonated with the voice of the Ignis in front of him.

Words he had already heard, in this very place.

"It is the site of which I already warned, where you will see the painful people who lost the gift of intelligence"

~ • ~

Locking Revolver in this pit was as easy as catching a rat. Sure, when you ask an exterminator to do it for you.

Windy deceived the algorithms used by the Knights of Hanoi to access a weak and small part of their network, time was limited, and discovering it would have been easy. However, the Wind Ignis mentioned having felt the untouchable leader was confused and Soulburner confirmed it as soon as he saw him, he thought it had been all the torturing that Windy performed with too much fun.

First, fool the Knights of Hanoi.

Second, catch him from one of his devices and force him to enter the network.

Third, lock him up in this hidden network where the data that made up Revolver's avatar was weak, and weaken him even more with each intolerable pain they caused him.

Yes, three things. Playmaker started doing that because Revolver had taught it to him. Revolver had been his saving voice, his trusted friend, but at the same time, the one who had caused him so much pain and left him alone when he shouldn't be. Even if they say he was the one who rescued them. It was all bullshit!

Soulburner slammed his fiery fist into Revolver's bare chest, hearing his heartrending screams bouncing off the walls. Seeing him tremble and his tears falling like the blood that overflowed from his mouth from the punches he received were so reassuring to Soulburner.

Revolver could barely get out a single word.

The last thing he had said was:

I will not die by your hands.

What the hell did that mean anyway?

"Of course you're not going to die in my hands." Soulburner took him by the neck and forced him up, even though his feet, his legs were so burned that they barely bent. "You will die alone. One day I will come to see you and you will be rotten as a plant. This is how we could have ended up, with only six years!" He pressed down on his throat, causing him to cough weakly.

"Sometimes I wish ... Every time I think that Playmaker …"

He pushed him against the wall as he released him, taking a few steps away. He opened his palm and a flame more powerful than when he was in front of Jin ignited, threatening Revolver to burn him completely. "Now you can't hide behind your mask. Should I get you a new one if I burn all your face?"

He held his breath, his teeth clenching painfully as his fingers stopped resisting the heat, but Soulburner enjoyed this pain, because it didn't mean anything compared to what Revolver was be about to feel.

"Enough!"

He barely heard that yell, recognizing that voice and thinking that he had imagined it after launching the flames. He felt the flames return to him, but they only enveloped him like a warm cloak.

After protecting his eyes by closing them so they wouldn't be burned, he slowly opened them, seeing that in front of him was Flame.

Flame, protecting Revolver.

Soulburner blinked, over and over. In short, it was Flame.

Why? Why? Why? Why?

Why is he here? Why Flame? Why?!

His head was throbbing, his hands burned more than they should, and Flame didn't have a scratch. He was looking at him as if judging him.

"Movw away, Flame. Or are you on his side?"

Revolver was lying on the ground, probably unconscious.

"Why are you doing this, Soulburner? And don't use Playmaker as an excuse!"

"He's the one who caused us all this pain! Why don't you want to see it?! Not you, not Playmaker! Maybe you don't care …"

Soulburner turned around, if he continued like this, he would end up doing something unforgivable.

"I care about you, Soulburner," Flame softened his voice, despite the pain and anger he felt inside. "That's why I protect Revolver, because I am also protecting you. You're not like this ... Takeru"

His fists were always clenched, gathering fire, a fire that he unleashed blindly against Flame. "Do not call me that way!"

Flame dodged, tripping over the chain that caught Revolver's right ankle and fell to the ground. He was afraid of the hateful look that Soulburner gave him, not in case it was going to do him any harm, but because his origin was harming himself.

"Lightning isn't saving you. He is only destroying you! Come back to your senses!"

"Don't talk like you know me, Flame. You don't really know me at all. Just because you were born from me do you think you have the right to tell me what to do? You don't know what I feel,” he started to say, his voice cracking in the process, barely noticing that he had left a slight burn on Flame's forearm, going through his jacket. "After all, you were born out of my suffering. I wish…

... I wish you were never born, Flame"

~ • ~

Windy was left wandering the corridors, knowing that he was meant to return to Jin, but he didn't want to be near him. Feeling watched was horrible, and when he was alone, all he could think about was Lightning's mistrust of him.

What did Lightning think of him? What did Lightning think about Jin?

What was Lightning thinking?

He stopped his steps when he found the inevitable. He expected to see Jin in Soulburner's room, however, he was staring stupidly at the stained glass window depicting an angel. The same one Lightning was drooling over.

"Like father like son?" He snorted, causing Jin to turn to see him. "What are you looking at? Oh yeah. You have to be stick to me, you remember?"

There was only silence. Windy hated silence.

"Of course you wouldn't answer me. Cool, I don't need to hear your stupid voice. I have enough with Flame's, and his whiny origin. And now Playmaker will share a roof with us?" He sighed heavily, crossing his arms. "Sometimes I wish all of this would turn to ashes."

"Starting with you, Windy?"

The voice was not the only thing that startled the Windy, but the hand on his shoulder.

Lightning.

"I don't think it's much different from when, you know, you let Revolver nearly destroy me."

But Lightning wouldn't let him burn to ashes, he was sure of that. He repeated that thought in the privacy of his mind until he believed it.

Ignoring what was said by the Wind Ignis, Lightning approached his origin and extended his hand. Jin took it without hesitation, causing Windy to feel a terrible ache in his chest. "I'm taking him for tonight."

"Ow, are they going to fuck?"

Lightning stopped abruptly, settling to glare at him.

Windy raised his hands in surrender. "Just kidding"

As soon as the Light Ignis took his… pet, Windy headed to his own room. That heaviness in his chest was suffocating him, and he wanted to throw himself onto the bed, close his eyes and maybe do what Flame does.

Sleep.

Would he dream something exhilarating this time?

He didn't have time to do all that when he stepped into his room, someone was already behind the door, knocking on it. Windy sighed in annoyance, yanking the door open, thinking that he would meet Lightning and his faithful puppy. "I thought you would leave me alo…"

But it was just Flame.

No. Flame was shattered, not physically, except for the scratch on his arm, but his eyes looked dead. With those same dull eyes, he stared at Windy and said, “You were right, Windy"

So that's what it was about. Windy didn't hold back his smirk and grabbed Flame's burned arm tightly to drag him into the room.

He thought he would be the one to do it, but was surprised when Flame gave him a sudden, surly kiss. His fingers pressing on his crystal to undo his clothes, and without further ado, he lifted him.

Flame cornered him against the door, forcing him to sink into his sad and angry heat.

Windy couldn't be more satisfied.

~ • ~

He was looking at the ceiling. He could only do that because if he turned around, he would see the curtain Flame had given him and remember how good it had felt to attack him with his own fire.

He was not supposed to feel sadness or pain, and yet they were there.

Why Flame? How…?

No. He did know the answer. But just thinking about it increased his anger, and at any moment he would burn the bed.

The only thing capable of putting out his raging fire was opening the door of his room to see the person he most wanted to have by his side tonight, with his emerald eyes shining in a golden light and a smile on his lips.

"Welcome, Playmaker."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated.
> 
> You can follow me on:
> 
> Twitter: @CrimsonDreams4  
> Tumblr: xxxcrimsondreamsxxx


	8. Untied

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If he's honest now...  
> Is he coming untied?  
> Is he one of us?  
> Now the start is in sight.  
> The darkness found the light, and will try to turn it off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The uni is killing me. Sorry!
> 
> But here's the update!

**_“In the universe everything shines and preaches the dharma._ **

**_Responding to each other, the one certifies the other._ **

**_Question, answer, certification, they are in perfect harmony. "_ **

**_~°~_ **

He never knew what it meant to have a family; he couldn't remember even questioning it under the shade of a tree. They didn´t talk about it at the orphanage but the word sometimes slipped from the lips of another kid who cried because no one wanted him. Who loved him? Did he ever cry about it?

Yes, he was born and lived with his parents. Parents who stopped looking for him a week after he disappeared, then he returned with the news that they were traveling and would take a few days to return.

Those were the longest days of his life. Sixteen years, to be more precise. He knew on the second day that he didn't have to wait; waiting was an illusion that would just make him fall into the depression he was trying so hard to avoid. He could get by on his own, with that voice that filled him with hope when the light from the small room tormented him.

He didn't think about his parents. He thought of that voice and nothing else.

Smiling was difficult and so was having friends. Meeting someone required an effort that his heart suppressed completely, so communicating was defined as unnecessary, a powerful anxiety that darkened his mind and silenced the voices that said: _Everything's fine. It's just one person. What could happen? What could happen to your heart?_

It was always about that. To protect his heart which was empty, even when he had nothing, he kept it from breaking. It was the only thing he could care for, and his head wandered in musings that insisted that he might be in constant danger.

Although at times, he felt so invisible in the crowd that being in danger was something that would never happen, as no one noticed him. If he disappeared again, nothing would happen. So if he faced the Knights of Hanoi, and he got hurt trying — falling into his traps — it meant nothing. The problem would be that dying would interfere with his goal, his revenge.

Because of this, he was doing his best to keep breathing and get stronger.

Who were the people who began to occupy his heart after that?

Lots of blurred faces filled his vision. His eyes were closed, but he wanted to open them, blink to see those faces and say their names.

He was becoming incapable of that; his throat was forming an unbearable lump. Could he cry because those names meant nothing and he had realized how lonely he was?

_"What do you want?"_

He opened his mouth, his tongue hitting his roof, indecisive of his response. Could he answer honestly or would he pretend that he didn't want anything ...?

... That he didn't have the right to want something?

_"Answer me…"_

_"D...?"_

_"I can't hear you."_

_"Death"_

What was the use of being alive if there was nothing for him? Woah, even _he_ was shocked at his own thoughts, discovering that trying to go forward was like searching for the light in an eternally dark tunnel. Only now was he realizing how naive his mind was.

_"Why?"_

_"Nobody needs me. Nobody wants to be saved. So, I am no longer needed"_

He was tired, that was the truth.

But as soon as he pronounced what he refused to accept, his blurred vision cleared up in the image of a boy with glasses, hair showing off the beautiful mixture of silver with red and a dazzling smile. Was that the light of his tunnel?

That light… it was very weak.

_"You want them to need you, you want to need someone and to feel like that’s acceptable"_

Why did he keep using the word 'need'?

He just nodded.

_"The light of your desires is weak, because you never thought of them before. The silence kept them well and you never thought you needed something or someone. You are alone"_

_"I am alone"_

_"And suffering"_

_"My past haunts me. My emptiness ... is unbearable"_

_"Let me fill you up."_

He felt hands on his face, wrapping him in their warmth. The pain faded slightly.

_"Close your eyes"_

Were they open? He would swear to have them closed, for he couldn't see anything. However, he obeyed.

Then, he saw that smile again; the boy in his memories who sometimes changed his appearance for a more extravagant one but his essence remained the same. His heart beat painfully against his chest every time he saw him smile, it was like a vitamin, a necessity …

…An addiction.

He clung to that smile he gave him, he wanted to think that every time he looked at him and smiled it was because there was something between them. Something close to a friendship.

_"Takeru …"_

He was afraid of that name and at the same time, it filled him with life. He was afraid to feel something beyond their mutual trust, because to get attached was to lose, and losing was painful.

First, Kogami Ryoken, he was the closest thing to a friend, someone to whom he would give his heart with his eyes covered, because that was how it had been since he was six. But his paths were not meant to be shared.

Second, Kusanagi Shoichi, a man desperate to get his brother back, ends up forming a bond with him to rescue him. If Jin was rescued, their bond would no longer bear a name. It’d mean nothing.

Third, Ai was born out of his own suffering and had never stopped to connect that origin to his relationship. He didn't declare that there was a bond between them, but Ai never let him fall, literally, taking his hand gave a lightness to his soul that carried the weight of the constant fight. Being with Ai was sharing that weight. That's how he would define it.

Or so he made him believe, since, in one way or another, Ai was using him, and he was using Ai. That was acceptable.

Instead, with Takeru, the relationship could be defined in a similar way, and yet it was another painful burden he wanted to get rid of.

Takeru wanted to be happy with him, that was the secret he was keeping. But how much of that was true?

_"You want to be happy?"_

_"I'm not sure of what that means"_

_"Who are you? What do you want?"_

Again, his tongue locked before speaking. There were two names that sounded correct and confusing.

Playmaker or Yusaku.

Who was the one who wanted happiness? They were two completely different persons; strong and weak; indifferent and sensitive; cold and warm. Light and darkness.

One had no heart, the other lost it on the way and someone picked it up.

He saw the image of Takeru holding his heart and kindly handing it to him as if it were the train ticket.

_"You want to be happy?"_

He lifted his head, still with his eyelids glued to make him blind.

_"Yes. I want to be happy"_

His own voice was more perceptible, as was the other's.

_"Then open your eyes, Playmaker."_

It was difficult, but a light began to shine in front of his eyes and ended the darkness that trapped him in his pain.

~°~

It was as if something was missing from his chest. The bunch of voices that surrounded him, but were not directed at him, were unbearable, the pain of feeling alone was beginning to bother him.

How many days had it been since Yusaku disappeared from his sight?

Even his duel disk disappeared, so he had to find another container to reside in as he was looking for his partner. That means, he got his own SOLtis body.

"Yusaku? You may have been confused, until now only I have worked here,” Kusanagi replied.

Ai was desperate, he was almost about to shake off the man for answering such a thing. How could he not remember Fujiki Yusaku?

He tried to sneak into the school where Yusaku attended, but he barely made it to the door because the guards took him away as he was scaring the students. Well, he began to interrogate each boy and girl who wore the uniform of that school, at the entrance time, without even waiting to enter the establishment properly.

It was easy for him to sneak into the school database only to find no information that Yusaku ever existed there.

Nothing. There was nothing. The same happened with Takeru.

Lightning had caught them both.

Ai decided to access the network, face the Light Ignis and return with Yusaku. He couldn't bear a reality where that name didn't carry any meaning, where everything they had lived until today disappeared like nothing.

As he traveled the net, he only focused on repeating to himself that there was no way Yusaku could have stayed with Lightning by his own free will. If this prevented a war, well, it sounded nice, but sacrificing one's existence for the peace of others?

He couldn't help but feel a certain imbalance. Also, because now Lightning's words didn't stop posing a threat.

He hated having to distrust.

He hated having to hate Lightning.

~°~

His fell to the ground, another heavy body laid on top of him and they became a tangle of warm arms and legs that not even the cold ground could attack. "Don't you think we've had enough?" Windy gasped, getting used to the exhilarating sensation of the bead of sweat dripping down his temple, imitating the physical reactions that occur in humans whenever they exert themselves in such a way. Would humans have resisted doing this so many times?

How did they call that limitation so exciting that it made them intensely release the last of their being?

How many times did he feel it? One, two, three…? Five times?

His face was not too far from Flame's, and they refused to let go of the other. That dead look in the Fire Ignis eyes disappeared and now carried a rather curious, almost golden glow. Windy was not very attentive to details, barely opening his eyes every time Flame entered him.

Flame was different this time, he started in a very abrupt and painful way, he didn't know when he forgot that description and everything became so…

…passionate. As if they were perfectly compatible.

There was an energy; a warmth so alive that Flame released and gave only to him. He could feel it, affirm it. Windy _had_ Flame.

He had something for himself, finally. He just had to stop worrying about losing it.

"Have you had enough of me?" Flame whispered, his face buried in his neck and his warm voice blowing his skin.

Windy chuckled.

"No. I think it’ll be more difficult for you to get rid of me than for me to get rid of you" he trembled slightly at the thought of Flame leaving him, for some reason, and his tongue reacted in the same way, about to mention that name that created a rift between the two "If Soulburner forgives you, your mind will be divided"

His hands landed on Flame's shoulders and clung to them as if it were the only support for him to stay conscious. Why was he so tired and desperate? It was as if his own emotions were mixed with Flame's, or maybe he was just imagining stupid things because of his free will.

Flame, meanwhile, looked up and showed confusion. "What does Soulburner got to do with all this?"

Now they were both confused. Flame acted as if he didn't remember anything about what happened last night, if anything had happened. It's not like Flame told him, either, but he only needed to look at him to know that Soulburner had put him off. So why was he behaving like none of that happened?

Maybe it didn't happen. Windy was thinking too much.

"Forget what I said," he shook his head, laughing forcibly. "Anyway, we have to stop at some point, now Lightning's pet watches over me," he said as the two separated, finding some trouble to sit up.

"Well, this isn't the only thing we can do," Flame uttered with surprising sweetness, accompanied by a kiss as soft as his voice. Windy was caught up in the confusing sensations he produced in him.

When they did _'that'_ , the kisses felt like passionate and electrifying connections that served to awaken the most intense stimulations. That is, they only served the passion that was being delivered at that time and there was no other intention.

However, this kiss was telling him otherwise. Although he couldn't define the feeling. It was like the sadness that was reflected in the pathetic union of lips between Playmaker and Soulburner.

The feeling that Flame gave him was far from that sadness.

"Something like what?"

Despite being the one who stopped the warm closeness of his, he returned to entangle himself on Flame, climbing onto his lap and wrapping his arms around his neck. Flame was smiling, it was a small smile but quite nice.

Every time he saw him, Windy had that need to thank Lightning for the idea of giving them these bodies that revealed new expressions and sensations. But those positive thoughts disappeared as quickly as they appeared.

Flame only meant a game to him, a toy that had his name on it. It was easy to get bored in such a big place where everyone treated him like a servant that no one could trust. Flame was so innocent, so stupid, even though he thought he knew everything.

Flame didn't know that he was under Windy's control.

Flame placed his fingers on top of Windy's crystal, making his white shirt reappear. When it wasn't buttoned-up, it looked as if Windy was wearing a delicate white curtain over his shoulders.

_Curtain_. Why did that object mean something so important to him?

Rather than keep wondering about that, he continued to turn his attention to Windy, stroking his cheek. "Whatever you want. Tell me…"

It was his turn to dress up, but he did it completely, pressing down on his own crystal. He wanted to see Windy's body, appreciate it just a little more, and feel the warmth of his skin, even if it was fake. It was like feeling a human.

"Windy… what do _you_ want to do?"

The question echoed inside the Wind Ignis, shaking him terribly. Windy clung to Flame's garments and buried his face in his chest.

_What do I want?_

What a weird question. However, his meaning was innocent and completely different from how Windy was taking it. He couldn't help but feel suffocated, scared at not knowing what to answer.

"I…"

Flame looked at Windy, confused and concerned. Had he said something wrong?

They didn't have time to discover the answer to any other question when the door that Flame had been leaning his back against had been knocked insistently. Windy startled, straightened up quickly, and pressed the crystal in his neck to dress properly.

Flame's scent on him was so strong that even he could feel it, but nothing could be done against it, and he even liked it.

Both Ignis got up off the ground, and there was a few more knocks on the door until it finally opened without either giving permission.

He would never find Lightning knocking on the door. So, could it be …

Flame felt something in his chest, a feeling known as …

…anxiety.

"Do you want something?" Windy asked, stretching his arms and making a disinterested face, looking at the boy who had just entered.

Flame sighed. It was just the Light Ignis's origin.

Windy laughed. "Ah well, if you don't tell me what you want, then I can't keep wasting my time with you"

He grabbed Flame's hand firmly and led him — dragged him — out of the room, past Jin, the boy stopped him by taking Windy by the arm.

"Windy…" Flame started to warn him, it wasn't difficult to know why Jin was here, if Lightning sent him to accompany Windy wherever he goes. That is, keep an eye on him. It would be best not to fight him.

"Shut up. You asked me what I wanted to do, and what I want is for this _thing_ to leave me alone” Windy sounded noticeably annoyed, more than usual. He turned to point his free hand at the human. "Listen to me well, dumb shit. I'm going out with Flame, and if Lightning doesn't like that, he could send someone to tell me word by word, but you can't even talk. So…"

He didn't have to struggle too hard for Jin to release him. His arm hurt, the human had been using his strength, which was a lot, however, he was not upset or shaken by the Ignis words. Why had Lightning released his face if his expressions were null?

As if he cared. Windy didn't have to worry about that puppet anymore, not now that he was with Flame, heading into the garden.

"You shouldn't have done that," Flame muttered. Always caring about others.

"I don't care," he spat out these words, a wide smile decorating his face as he continued walking, his legs still shaking from the terror that filled him when he faced that human.

He blurted out all those words and felt like he was yelling at Lightning, and he knew that if Lightning had been in the human's shoes, he would have shut him up. What would Flame have done, then?

Would he be paralyzed like that time?

He was curious, even with that idea in his head, Flame made him feel safe, feel like he could insult Lightning from head to toe and nothing would happen to him.

If he had Flame under control, then everything was under control.

~°~

Something was wrong. Something was completely wrong, and he knew what the reason was. He was sure it would happen at any moment, because underestimating him was the stupidest thing he could do, especially when it came to his origin.

Ai was perfectly capable. That’s how he saw him.

So, it was clear that he would be able to break through the barriers of this network to search for his origin, Playmaker. Probably everyone outside had already forgotten Fujiki Yusaku, Playmaker, the hero of VRAINS. Ai couldn't tolerate something like that. Why? Why was he so attached to humans and their beliefs?

Lightning searched everywhere for the answer, sought to understand what it was about, where free will came from, how humans were able to handle it, and if one day he felt anything other than intrigue, what he should do to control it.

He felt fear, anger, but it was all due to intrigue; the lack of answers. When afraid, humans always ended up destroying their belongings, everything around them, even themselves. Ai failed to see that part of reality; it was as if his eye was programmed to see only the positive side of his surroundings.

Why didn't he have something like that?

The simulations declared his fate. What would take him to that destination? His own despair? Or the fact that humans were only good at destroying themselves? If he was born from a human, it meant that the blame for the destruction caused by his hands was on the humans who created him, and not his.

Humans were the enemy. Everything they did not like, they erased it. At any moment they would discover the truth.

And their answer would be …

... kill the Ignis; their creation. What would happen if he does that first?

_Erase. I have to erase_.

What would Ai do in his position?

"Lightning!"

And there he was, feeling more furious than ever, even though he was smiling nonchalantly as usual.

He wasn't going to ask him. Giving up and asking for his advice was something so stupid that he didn't even want to admit that he considered. Also, the decision was already made.

"Ai"

He turned to look at him with the seriousness that characterized him, that expression that clearly showed how different they were.

"I came to kindly ask you to give Playmaker back" Ai flashed a smile from ear to ear, quite fake.

"Oh? You finally became a diplomat. Maybe you don't even know what that word means” he turned to the window, folding his arms. Ai bothered him, bothered him too much to look at him and stay still. "Playmaker decided to stay, like Soulburner"

"Ah, so, I'm talking to the wrong person"

"Ai, if you dare to approach your origin, I am personally going to eliminate you" he fixed his piercing gaze on the other's, who didn’t even look startled, in fact, Ai was approaching, extending his hand to place it above Lightning's head.

"You can't threaten me when I'm the taller one" Ai giggled as soon as Lightning showed agitation at that comment and the contact he was receiving. He hated Ai. "Oh, and let’s not mention the platforms you put on those boots"

He hated that he approached him so easily and he was never able to prevent it.

Lightning took a step back and almost stumbled, really hoping that the clumsiest Ignis of all didn’t notice his slip.

"I don't know why you decided to use these bodies, but it really was a great idea. I love how I look, but…” he took Lightning by the wrist and forced him closer. Lightning was shaking "… I love how _you_ look"

It was the first time Lightning felt this uncomfortable sensation on his cheeks, as if they were burning.

He forcefully pushed Ai away as best as he could, promising himself never to allow Ai the right to touch him again. "What are you playing at?"

"Oh, that's what I've come to ask"

Ai stretched out his arms, and looked away from him.

"I’ve never understood what you think, Lightning, and now I'm desperate to understand. You're separating us, and really, it's unnecessary"

"I only do what is best for everyone"

"You declared war on the humans! And now you're kidnapping them! What does all this mean?!" Ai showed his true colors, finally.

"What war?" he smiled; a smile that could be defined as malicious. "You're the only one who's talking about a war, aren't you?"

Ai put a hand to his chest. Lightning was right, Kusanagi only mentioned his comatose brother as if it were normal, resigned to not knowing the cause. Soulburner acted so carefree, no one saw Lightning as a threat.

No one thought of Lightning that way.

Except for…

"I need to see Playmaker"

Ai's feet were determined to move, but for some reason they didn't, they got stuck to the ground, causing him to stumble as he struggled too hard and his body ended up slamming on the floor.

He couldn't get up off the ground, especially when Lightning put a foot on his back and pressed it. "You never listen to my warnings, Ai. The only one who would bring misfortune would be you, I’m avoiding it. So, who’s the real bad guy in this story?"

"Let go!"

"You laugh falsely, you want something from me, an out of place reaction so that you don’t have to hate me. The truth is…"

He leaned down to brush his lips against his ear. "That I don't have feelings like you, I don't carry the clumsiness of a heart. None of you should be that weak, but you are. I learned not to look at you, not to be interested in your strange free will. Love? Bonds? Friendship? Lies to please yourself. Only I know and understand that truth. The humans you adore so much are the reason for chaos, and we are the trigger. The excuse"

"It's you ... who would pull the trigger"

"No. _You_ will do it"

His fingers slid gently down Ai's neck until they reached his crystal. Ai felt an intense current hit him. "Look at them, the simulations, and you will remember my words"

He tried to force a logout on the Dark Ignis, but his code was curiously complicated, causing a delay that gave Ai a chance to break free and defend himself.

He didn't know when Ai had drawn a sword, similar to the one he had seen in Decode Talker, the card he shared with Playmaker.

It wasn't just the sword that left him confused, but the cut he had left on his leg. It hurt too much and the fake blood was starting to run, he tried to repair it, but he wasn't focused enough to deal with it now.

Ai… he charged with fury in his eyes that this time he was demonstrating.

Lightning, hiding his fear from him, began to laugh. "Are you going to erase me? Do it. But curiosity will continue to eat away at your head and sooner or later, you will know that you were wrong"

His expression softened. "I wouldn't mind if… you killed me now," Lightning confessed. At this moment, Ai should be able to feel the presence of Playmaker, and if he took his eye off him, he would go looking for him. Lightning could still hear Playmaker's thoughts and he felt their strong connection, it was bothering him.

He had recently managed to take part of Playmaker's consciousness, it was more difficult to control than Soulburner's and with Ai present, much worse.

Why weren't he and Jin…?

Before he could keep wondering this, Ai was already advancing towards him with the tip of his sword threatening to pierce him. As soon as Ai got close, there was a quick strange feeling. A dark feeling, similar to anger and anguish, and Ai was directing it towards him.

It was fascinating seeing him like this. That hatred coming out of his program which was used to behaving with frivolity and innocence.

Yes, Ai was acting differently for some reason that he couldn't understand yet, and that was about to kill him. He shouldn't be fascinated at a time like this.

He had to defend himself. He didn't, because someone took his body as if he were a doll and took him away from danger, he didn't pay much attention to who it might have been, until Ai stopped looking like a rabid animal, starting to laugh. "You complain so much about humans, but Jin just saved your life. Is it really convenient to kill them, Lightning ~ sama?" Ai winked at him mockingly, before disconnecting.

Lightning had lost all his cool, he didn't even remember the wound that he had to heal when he fell to his knees because of it, feeling mostly the grip of the one that had protected him.

He now released him, to kneel in front of him.

Lightning looked up, and saw a boy with teary eyes. Jin was crying, covering his mouth as if he was looking at a corpse.

The Light Ignis was no longer hearing the annoying throbbing of the connection between Ai and Playmaker. He felt a very intense pain in his chest and it was coming from the person in front of him.

Jin was looking at the blood running down his leg, that's why he was crying.

Although he didn't know why, Lightning smiled attempting to calm him down. His origin was trembling, silencing his sobs with his hands. So much for a simple cut?

"There is no harm that cannot be removed, Jin. Stop crying"

He wanted to sound indifferent, to stop looking at him, but his tears and the anguish he reflected were mesmerizing.

~°~

He always arrived at the hospital when the white walls were tinted pink, thanks to the evening sky. Although at that time he could not spend much time with his brother, only an hour and then he had to continue working.

All the money he earned he spent on his own food, his business, and then gifts for Jin, his little brother. He came to the room where Jin ‘slept’ with his arms full of bags, which he gently dropped to the side of the bed to sit in the chair next to the bed and take his brother’s warm hand.

"I'm sorry I'm late. I ran so much that I tripped and scraped my knee" Shoichi commented with some grace "I remembered when the same thing happened to me playing soccer with you, you started crying as if I was going to die"

A weak laugh echoed through the room.

That had happened a few weeks before...

He couldn't remember well. There was a void in his mind that he didn't try to fill, he didn't want to make that effort. All he thought was that the only thing he could remember was Jin's voice when he was six years old.

And then, he slept for ten whole years. That was what his memory told him.

He didn't stop talking to him, even so. He couldn't stop treating him like he was awake, it didn't matter if he never opened his eyes again.

He would wait. He wasn't quite sure what he expected, but he knew that sitting down and holding his brother's hand was the only thing he had to do.

He wiped his own tears with the back of his hand. "So, I told you, 'there is no harm that cannot be healed' and suddenly, you calmed down"

~ • ~

Playmaker's eyes were beautiful when they shone like that, he was proud to be able to tell what his laugh sounded like. Although he was clumsy for descriptions, he could only tell that it was like an angelic song that relaxed his entire body.

Every time he smiled, he wanted to kiss him. What was stopping him from doing it? Oh yeah, he wouldn't stop talking and Playmaker wouldn't stop listening.

They were both lying in bed, holding hands, and realizing that this was real, Soulburner did nothing but stay silent to appreciate the presence of Playmaker next to him.

"I'm happy you're here," he confessed after a few minutes.

Playmaker just nodded, his smile growing weak.

"Is something wrong?"

"Just thinking…"

Soulburner settled on the bed and took both of his hands firmly. "You can tell me anything"

His gleaming eyes met and Playmaker felt what he had not felt for a long time, safety. Even the concerning feeling that someone else was calling him had soon disappeared.

"The night you ... couldn't sleep, and you wanted to talk to me ..."

It was Soulburner's turn to fade his smile, he did not remember that exact moment that Playmaker was describing, but now, he was starting to relive it in his own flesh and was about to confess that it had been many nights like this. However, he preferred to remain silent.

Playmaker wasn't looking at him anymore, he knew how painful it was. "I wouldn't have bothered if you did," he murmured, caressing Soulburner's hand. "I've always felt lonely, I wanted someone to be with me, although it was hard for me to admit it. I would have been happy if you called me in the middle of the night or at any time of the day. There were so many things I wanted, from you, from me; from us and I was never able to pronounce them, that's why… " he sighed. "Maybe I expected something from you, as you expected something from me"

"Your silence was my worst enemy, I was afraid you’d walk away for…" Soulburner began to say.

"... the pain that we share" Playmaker finished “I needed you …

…because I love you"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated!
> 
> You can follow me on:
> 
> Twitter: @CrimsonDreams4  
> Tumblr: xxxcrimsondreamsxxx

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading! And I hope this AU dominates the fandom for a long time ... I mean ... cough
> 
> See ya!


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